Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again… Which character is your uni?
Sorry, but we can’t all be young Donna
It's a scientific fact that whoever decided to commemorate ABBA through one of the most elaborate and really quite inconclusive musical DNA tests of all time, is actually a genius. Everybody has gone Mamma Mia crazy, and I'm here for it. And besides, as it didn't come home after all, and we have to admit that Love Island really is a total fix, these small 120 minute ABBA tributes might be all we've got left.
So book your plane to Greece (or Croatia where the sequel was actually filmed, soz) and prepare yourself as we ask the most important question of summer 2018…when will this fucking heatwave end?
Leeds – Donna Sheridan
Donna loves a place that prides itself on its edginess and actually encourages dungaree wearing, and so do you. Just how she convinces everyone around her that yes she is fine and no she doesn't need a man, you convince yourself that you're better than the rest, both academically and aesthetically.
Bristol – Young Donna
Young Donna experiments with men, and you also like to experiment with the unknown. It's all part of finding yourself and breaking free of the white middle class privilege that's been handed to you on a plate. But just like how Donna's eyes widened when she realised she could convert an idyllic and peaceful Greek paradise into an overpopulated tourist hotspot, you'll always revert back to your privileged ways.
Exeter – Sophie Sheridan
Your mum told you it was a great place to be and now you feel obliged to stay. It's okay though, there are plenty of other posh whiny students to keep you company while you reject real potential job prospects in order to fulfil your mother's wishes.
Manchester – Rosie Mulligan
Just because it's 'Donna and the Dynamos' doesn't mean that like Rosie, you can't be the centre of attention. With a questionable fashion choice and even more questionable taste in men (Old Bill, really??) you're a bit of a mess but somehow everyone loves you and you still manage to make it work.
Newcastle – Tanya Chesham-Leigh
The hotel's grand opening had no dress code but still Tanya wore a ballgown and heels while poor Sophie wore a fucking rainbow poncho. Like all of your nights out, you're. just. so. very. extra.
We get it! Newcastle is fun!
We just can't be arsed to get a train to Scotland (almost) to see you.
Oxford and Cambridge – Harry Bright
Like how Colin Firth plays exactly the same character in every film he's been in, you're surrounded by (and are one of) the same type of students each year: super smart, but with absolutely no social skills.
Cardiff – Bill Anderson
You pride yourself on being exotic and love to tell everyone that you do, in fact, live in a different country now. It's all fun and games while it lasts but when you look back you realise that you've actually just spent the last four years stuck on a small boat sailing past the much better parties on the English shores.
UWE – Sam Carmichael
Although failing to hit the right (academic) notes like his younger other half, you admire Sam's loyalty to Donna and all things edgy so much that you try to recreate it yourself to guarantee all prospective students a good time. It's just a shame when you open your mouth.
Brookes – Young Sam
Like how young Sam tries to lie about the fact that he has a fiancé waiting at home, you have more looks than common sense. You can also afford to sack a year off from the real world using mummy and daddy's wallet. That's not a shack you're living in, Sam, that's the first step on an extremely competitive property ladder.
Durham – Sophie's Grandma/Cher
Let's be honest, the film producers only brought in Cher to name drop, and you've pretty much done the same thing. Her ten minutes of screen time is pretentious and difficult to stomach, just like your degree. Looks good on paper, but that's it.
Sheffield – Fernando
He's lusted after Sophie's grandma and her many glittery get ups all his life, and just like Fernando you're forever wishing you could be as cool as your Northern brothers and sisters. But just because you're close enough geographically to Leeds and Manchester to duet, doesn't mean you should.
Nottingham – Sky
You thought uni would be the place to go and discover a new you, but instead you found yourself trapped in a boring monotonous lifestyle of folding beach towels and spearing halloumi kebabs for the hotel guests.
You only really feel free when you're singing topless with your mates in Ocean thinking about what could have been.
Birmingham – Donna's Donkey
With a comfortable enough place to stay and alright friends to live with, just like Donna's donkey you thought you'd hit the jackpot. But aside from a slightly better than average American Football team, reality is you're still easily forgotten about until someone needs something, and pretty much live in a shit stables.
Swansea – Old Greek Islander
It's not hard to carry twigs, and it's not hard to get into Swansea either.