Edinburgh students told us their best tales of spoiled brats adapting to university life
Life without the live-in maid proves difficult for some
I remember the first time I had to fend for myself in self-catered halls. Gone were the days of decent dinners, nice cheeses and ready-made hot water bottles at my convenience. But as humans, we adapt. I soon realised that cooking rice wasn't rocket science and that I too could make a bolognese that wouldn't taste like dog food. But, that's not the story for some.
We put out a request on our Instagram for tales of spoiled brats who just didn't know how to cope (the poor things), and you lot delivered.
We hereby present to you 13 times when the rich kids of Edinburgh realised they had to do things for themselves.
"There was a girl on my floor who genuinely didn't know how to wash her own hair"
When I was in Chancellor's in first year there was a girl on my floor who genuinely didn't know how to wash her own hair. She had always gotten it done at a salon and I had to teach her how during Fresher's Week. She also saw my nail varnish one night and asked me how I painted my nails, she had never done them herself.
"My friend has never taken the bus"
My friend has never taken the bus, and to this day refuses to get on one. She has literally taken a taxi while we all go on the bus, just to avoid it."
"Fuck the UK, I miss my maid."
I have a friend from Morocco who is super rich. He has had maids his whole life and has been tended to hand and foot. When we were in first year he had a lot of trouble with doing his own washing. Once, he sent us a Snapchat with his wet clothes hanging in the tub of his en-suite because he couldn't hack the dryer. The caption read 'Fuck the UK, I miss my maid.'
"He didn't know that fruit could come in a tin"
I took my sheltered boyfriend to my grans for dinner and he was very confused with the fruit cocktail she served us. He didn't know that fruit could come in a tin.
"Pull the cord"
I told my flatmate in first year that in order to turn the hoover on you had to pull the cord as you would when you started a boat. She did it.
"My flatmate didn't understand that you have to pay for electricity and gas"
My flatmate last year didn't know how to use an oven or microwave. She had never wiped a counter down and also didn't understand that you have to pay for electricity and gas so she was very confused when the first bill came through.
"I once had a flatmate that didn't understand the concept of defrosting food"
I once had a flatmate that didn't understand the concept of defrosting food yet she was an expert in anal sex and telling me all about it. Not once did I ever ask for her advice on anal.
"Our rich Norwegian flatmate asked us, after ten weeks in halls, where the outside bins were"
Our rich Norwegian flatmate asked us, after ten weeks in halls, where the outside bins were – she had been waiting for them to be taken away from her room. She also imported expensive Norwegian cheese to the UK and whenever we'd get drunk we would draw penises onto the top. Needless to say we were not invited to share her New Town house in second year.
"I know a girl who had never been on a train before age 18"
I know a girl who had never been on a train before age 18. Even when she went to London she wouldn't get on the tube because she just got taxis everywhere.
"My flatmate didn't know how to open a microwave"
My flatmate didn't know how to open a microwave so we had to show her and explain the mechanism. She also didn't know how to take bins out and once asked, "Do I keep the bag to use again next time?"
"At home in Malaysia I had a maid, butler and driver"
At home in Malaysia I had a maid, butler and driver. So when I got here I wasn't very used to cooking, cleaning and manual labour. I also found the average restaurant in Edinburgh so bad that I had to go to fine dining places every week.
"I had a flatmate who tried to dry her clothes in the microwave"
I had a flatmate who tried to dry her clothes in the microwave. She would do like two t-shirts at a time, like pure bundled up in a ball. Like, stuffed to filling the microwave and I only noticed because she kept doing them for like 30 seconds at a time at like 1am, so I kept hearing the *ding* go off. I came in and asked if she was drunk, and she got all sheepish and said "No, just doing laundry". I didn't even reply.
I had a flatmate who claimed he was "raised on M&S"
In second year, I had a flatmate who claimed he was "raised on M&S". He'd also always try to mop the floors of our kitchen but left them dirtier because he would just shuffle the dirt around.
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