REVEALED: Which is the most central Cambridge college?

Spoiler: it’s somehow not Girton

When I first saw the whole Camfess debate about the most central college, it got me thinking. Where are we classing as central and what are the most important places in Cambridge? Town, Mainsbury’s, Sidge, Revs area? No one seems to be able to agree. Like any other college debate, people are also incredibly biased.

So, naturally, The Tab ran a survey on Instagram for you to send in your opinions on which is most central college. The results were extremely close percentage-wise, but it looks like King’s has been crowned King.

1. King’s (21 per cent)

If representing the entire University wasn’t enough for them, they’ve only gone and taken the throne as most central college. Some students were even reluctant to name it as the most central. Yet with the abundance of tourists along King’s (ah) Parade in awe of its scaffolding glory, you can’t really argue with its centrality.

Located in the middle of Market Square and Sidge, King’s is arguably the geographical, political and symbolic centre of the Cambridge Universe.

However, a Camfess did slate humanities students for acting like Sidge is the centre of the UK, so in fear of the STEM students cancelling me, I shall move on.

Aw look it’s even celebrating Pride Month haha (Image credit: Matilda Head)

2. Corpus and Catz (19 per cent)

Finally putting two underrated colleges on the map. You may think we’re irrelevant, but who can leave at 8.50am or even later for their 9ams?

I might be a bit biased here as a Corpus student, but I do believe in the Cambridge Triangle. That is, the three areas here that rule my life (Sidge, town (+Lola’s) and Revs/Spoons) are all located in a weird triangular formation, in which Corpus (and Catz) sit in the middle.

Felt like the Bermuda Triangle during Michaelmas (Image credit: author’s own screenshot)

King’s, you might be close to town and Sidge, but could you just quickly nip over to spoons just like that? No, I didn’t think so.

Our neighbours across the road (Image credit: Becca Crawley)

One comment also pointed out that Corpus owns both the Eagle pub and Jack’s land. Whilst this ownership has nothing to do with centrality, you can’t fault Corpus for being on the doorstep of one of the most famous pubs in the country and next to a place which sells ice cream until 12am, especially during exam term. Even Camfess author Tom Selway admits that we could consider the “most central college” as “whichever is geographically closest to Jack’s.”

All good fun until the tourists come queuing in – get out of my pub! (Image credit: Patrick Dolan)

3. Caius (17 per cent)

Now back over to the other side of King’s, Caius takes second place. I can’t really dispute this one: you can quickly nip across into town or cut through King’s to Sidge, but you’re still a fair walk from the more social side of Cambridge.

The original Camfess post, by Tom Selway, however, suggests using a “Single Arbitrary Point'” to conclude “the most central college is whichever is geographically closest to the church” and its Datum point. Caius is 163ft away and therefore via this method, Caius wins over both King’s and Corpus/Catz. Nonetheless, this model does assume a flat earth.

Although, I did see a little too many Caius freshers commenting on this one on Instagram. Last time I checked you lived behind Sidge? How’s the walk to town from there?

I still remember that viral Tiktok from that top window (Image credit: Matilda Head)

Other competitors included Lucy Cav as the closest to castle mound, the “original heart of Cambridge”, and Christ’s as the “political centre” and the city’s centre rather than that of the University. Trinity also got a mention because “King’s is quite far from Market Square” and it “takes up so much space” so “how can it not [be the most central].” Peterhouse was claimed “the historic centre” to which “everything exists in relation.” John’s also got a mention for its proximity to Mainsburys and the river.

Someone even applied the 15-minute rule to Downing, suggesting it’s 15 minutes from the most important places such as the gym, train station, town, Sidge, and the ADC.

Now you know which college is most central, here’s a piece of advice for people from colleges who did not make the list: under no circumstance should you be a sofa surfer.

Go check out Tiktok for more content like this (Image credit: author’s own screenshot via @CambridgeTabTV TikTok)

And, Girton, if you do feel left out, please be reassured you got not just one, but multiple votes…

Feature Image Credits: Patrick Dolan

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