Jesus banter backfires

A letter detailing plans to pave over one of Jesus’ courts has been revealed to be fake.

A prankster at Jesus has got the College into a frenzy over alleged plans to pave over one of its courts.
The hoax included a mocked-up letter, which detailed the College’s immediate plan to pave over Chapel Court, and a questionnaire to be filled-in by students.
A fantasy letter was placed in each of the College’s student pigeonholes from one Siobhan Hutchins, who claimed she was the JCSU College Liaison Officer.
The position does not exist and Ms Hutchins has been outed as being fictional.
Ground work in Chapel Court could easily have duped students into believing this lie, however JCSU President David Lowry was quick to soothe student worries.
In an email sent to students, he said, “The College certainly does not have any plans to pave over Chapel Court. The work ongoing at the moment is to repair lawns which were damaged by this summer’s sculpture exhibition.”
Walking through the College grounds it is clear that this “repair” is extensive.
The usual grass in the centre of the Court has been replaced instead with freshly hoed and seeded grass.
"It's just really brown," commented one Jesus fresher.
Lowry, who refused to reveal the identity of the witty trickster, told The Tab, “Having spoken to the individual concerned, it was most definitely just a simple prank to see if they could convince people.”
In an email explaining the erroneous letter to members of the student body, Lowry expressed confusion as to the motives of the prank as well as questioning the culprit’s use of their time.
He said, “I presume that this letter was some sort of hilarious hoax on behalf of a person who clearly has more free time than personality. However, I would like to applaud their (frankly quite sad) accuracy in noting Council minutes and their very plausible use of Photoshop.”
Apparently the miscreant should work harder on their grass-roots humour in future.