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These are the 11 signs you’re stuck in a toxic friendship

Spot the red flags before it’s too late

5 years ago

We all have friends who can be annoying at times, but there are some friendships that quickly turn toxic without you realising. These "friends" will drain your energy, make you feel insecure about yourself and put you down a lot. Toxic friendships can leave you feeling jealous, angry and confused.

If you don't know what a toxic friendship looks like, think Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian, Caroline Calloway and Natalie Beach, Nicole Scherzinger and every other Pussycat Doll.

Reckon you might be stuck in a toxic friendship? If your friend does any of these following things, you definitely are!

1. Only ever talk about themselves

Every conversation you have somehow ends up being about your friend. They only seem to be interested in talking about their problems or successes. They'll never ask how things are with you or if they do, it sounds like they're doing it out of guilt.

2. Never want to listen to you

On the rare occasion you really need your friend's support, you'll try to talk to them, but you can see they're not really hearing you.

3. Interrupt all the time and take the story back to them

A lot of the time, toxic friends will cut you off and somehow weave the story back to them, diminishing the importance of what you were saying.

4. Criticise you instead of offering support

A good friend will never criticise you for no reason. Offering constructive support is one thing but being mean is another. A good friend isn't judgemental and will want to help you through struggles.

5. Make jokes they know will hurt you

Sometimes they may say mean things or embarrass you in front of other people. And when you tell them they've upset upset you or made you feel uncomfortable, they pass it off as a joke.

6. Aren't happy about any of your successes

When things are going well for you, they never want to be around and celebrate your successes. They may even make you feel guilty

7. Always make you feel like you're competing for their attention

A good friend will make time for you and you'll feel like you're picking up where you left off. They'll make you feel secure, not like you have to chase their attention all the time!

8. Pressure you into doing things you don't want to

You may have expressed you don't feel comfortable doing something but they will make you feel like you're being lame or not fun enough, instead of respecting your boundaries.

9. Always do things without considering your feelings

Examples include not turning up to things you both planned together, cancelling last minute, hanging out with your ex-boyfriend who you still really care about etc.

10. Gaslight you when you call them out on their bullshit

They'll manipulate you into thinking they did nothing wrong while making you believe you're too sensitive or completely misunderstood them.

11. Make you feel guilty for putting yourself first

In the instances you want to think about what's best for you and put yourself first, they will make you feel like you're being guilty or selfish.

What should you do when you realise you're in a toxic friendship?

You need to create some distance in this friendship until things begin to feel healthy, because toxic situations thrive when two people are codependent. You're just as responsible in this friendship, so if you notice that something isn't right, don't continue to ignore it.