Ah, another day, another Total Frat Move article which makes me want to die

Oh great, ‘8 Different Situations In Which It’s Okay To Cheat On Your Girlfriend’, lovely


Hello. Welcome to 2017. The word is full of new possibilities. A bright horizon. Total frat move is still trash tho, so not much has changed.

Total Frat Move’s new article, and I use the term ‘article’ loosely, about ‘8 different situations in which it’s okay to cheat on your girlfriend’ is, quite honestly, a load of crap. Shocking, I know, but bear with me. Obviously, obviously most of TFM’s articles are garbage, but this one, slap bang in the middle of cuffing season as we’re all freezing and insecure and terrified, is a particularly bad way to start the year.

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Not only does total frat move buy into the culture of hooking up with randos and cheating on your partner because it’s a brave new world and being faithful in a relationship apparently just isn’t cool anymore, but it does it in the most misogynistic and sexist way possible. It also makes light of some very serious issues, such as having to ‘explain to your girl why she’s suddenly HIV positive’, or the fact that ‘even the seemingly flawless O. J. Simpson missed a touchdown catch once’. I don’t know, maybe calling a convicted felon ‘flawless’ is a step too far. Also, maybe if you’re going to aim for misogynistic offensive humour, your references should leave the mid-1990s.

The mouth-breather who wrote the article obviously thought he was being hilarious, even comparing the question of whether cheating is okay to the question of whether a man can give himself a blowjob – ‘not sure if it’s possible, but it might be’. You can bet that in his basement writing studio he has sure as hell tried.

So when is it okay to cheat, according to TFM? ‘If your girlfriend cheated on you first’ is first on the list. Yes, a lot of people will have thought this, but I’m sorry, when did we all suddenly become babies, throwing our toys out of the pram and shouting ‘well you did it so I can do it too’? I thought we’d left that sort of behaviour back in primary school, at the very latest. If you’re keeping score like that in a relationship, it’s toxic and you should get out while you can.

Apparently if your girlfriend has abusive tendencies, it’s also okay to cheat on her. Because, duh, that’ll make everything better. Oh and by the way, if you’re in doubt, abusive tendencies include her being ‘cruel or psychologically manipulative’, yep sounds about right, or ‘threatens to physically harm you with a knife or some shit’, I’ll allow that, that sounds pretty abusive. Or maybe she’s forced you ‘to binge watch Gilmore Girls’. Because it’s apparently okay now to make light of domestic abuse, which causes roughly 1,300 deaths a year.

Ah, women!

Ah, women!

It’s okay though girls, because in the spirit of double standards, there’s also a very short list about when it’s okay for a girl to cheat on her boyfriend. Apparently it’s only okay if your boyfriend flies drones (?), or he makes lists on TFM, in a desperate attempt to look meta, self-aware and knowing.

The most frustrating thing about this article is the fact that it’s not the only one of it’s sort. There’s countless articles out there, all the same, all describing some ideal woman that is somehow going to be okay with cheating, or abuse, or the fuckboy persona. Thought Catalog’s ‘6 Reasons to Cheat On Your Girlfriend’ is one of them, arguably even worse that total frat move’s article.

So why do we keep letting people get away with writing stuff like this? Why are we buying into this society where it’s OK to belittle women, to make them into a punchline of some disgusting joke? And most importantly, who out there is enough of a loser to be still sharing TFM articles? Lmk.