How to make the most of who you meet at uni

Starting university can be daunting, with the jump to higher education, living alone for the first time and the unrealistic expectation to meet your whole uni friend group during Fresher’s week. With a whole new chapter of your life starting and so many new faces you don’t need to worry that you’ve ‘missed your chance’ if you haven’t met your people by the end of week one. As a first port of call, talking to your flatmates and having friendly faces to come home to every day makes such a difference, and by building  a friend group on your course you’ll definitely have shared interests.

Here are some of the ways which my flat got on so well and so quickly to hopefully inspire those of you starting uni this year to broaden the horizons for your friendships.

Make an effort to knock on people’s doors

To be clear, I’m not saying to do this if you’ve forgotten to do your laundry at 3am and you need some detergent. If it’s a normal time, invite your flatmates to do mundane tasks with you such as cooking, washing up, laundry, collecting a parcel and food shopping (trust me people will usually be really happy you asked and it’s a lot more casual).

I have to admit I was the person who was really bad at this to start but I really appreciated someone making the first step and it’s a lot easier from that moment onwards.

Don’t avoid the communal spaces

It is totally normal to feel self-conscious and overwhelmed at the start of uni and hide away in your room, phone your parents or watch your favourite show rather than talk to your flatmates. This shouldn’t make you feel like you have made a choice to now stay in your room for the rest of the year.

Maybe other people are more confident, but you don’t have to feel like you’ve left introducing yourself too late – it is never too late to introduce yourself and besides, better late than never.

Side note: Don’t be embarrassed about cooking with someone else in the kitchen – no one is completely sure of what they’re meant to be doing or how to do it in first year so there’s nothing to be embarrassed about if you aren’t acting like Gordon Ramsey.

Have a day around York

York is such a beautiful city to be in and although campus is a bit of a walk into town that makes it even more of an outing when you do venture in. During your first week go into York together and maybe go for coffee or just a walk. There are so many things to see besides the Minster and the walls that you can experience and explore.

Host a flat games night

Not everyone will want to go on nights out or drink all the time, they might even prefer to stay in the flat mostly so having the option of a weekly games night down the hall, where everyone can get involved in whatever way they want is really nice and really worked for us.

Some games to get things started: Jenga (you could also make it truth and dare on each block), Uno (easy classic), any board game (Cluedo is cool but takes a bit more time), Granny (we did this with the flat next door and used both of our corridors and it was so funny), group games on your phone (things like Jackbox are really good as they have lots of options and are also fun to just watch).

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You could also keep a score sheet or make a tally to make it into a fun competition.

Decorate and celebrate together

You’re going to be living in your accommodation for a year, so you’ll want to make it homely.

You can do this by printing photos throughout the year and putting them on the boards in the kitchen or on the fridge. We made a behaviour chart with five sections and everyone’s name on a post-it note that could be moved back and forth which was really fun.

Decorating the communal spaces for people’s birthdays is also a really nice thing for them to wake up to, especially when it may be their first birthday without their parents being there. You could also decorate for Christmas, Halloween and Galentines. Especially with Halloween round the corner, you could indulge in a group pumpkin carving night or all dress up in creative costumes to really feel the season. 

Study dates

Being in a flat with people who don’t do the same course as you does not mean you can’t study together.

I found it’s really nice to be able to run stuff by someone who is doing quite a different course and has a completely open mind about your work and is not comparing it to something they’re also working on. Also, on the funny side if they’re doing something you would hate to do it might give you a newfound appreciation for your course!

Plan a flat goodbye

This one is really important, worth the effort and a perfect way to end the year. In my flat there were an awards ceremony which included ” decorations, dressing up nicely, dinner and our favourite spot in the city for drinks.

As you go through the year you will figure out what you enjoy and don’t enjoy as a flat, you’ll probably have a favourite cafe, bar, pub or club and you will probably have obvious answers for ‘funniest’ or ‘biggest liability’ by the time it comes to having an awards ceremony.

It is also a lovely way to celebrate the friends you’ve made in first year and to reminisce on how much has happened since September which will make you feel much more ready for second year. Warning: if this list is followed I’m not promising you won’t cry when people leave for the summer and when you close your uni room door after moving out.