Which Game of Thrones castle is your College?

I mean we’re all planning on throwing boiling oil from the walls at some point anyway. Right?

Being a student at York is just like Game of Thrones, but with less sex scenes. I’m surprised no one had already written this.

Derwent – The Twins

Commanding the centre of both the University and Westeros, anyone without some form of transportation must pass through here. The Freys and Derwenters are a tightly knit group, prone to inbreeding and backstabbing those from outside their circle. Much as we all hope to one day see the Twins collapse into a pile of rubble, and her inhabitants expire, we can also hope that the majority of Derwent succumbs to the asbestos, shortly before fire consumes the buildings.

Alcuin – The Wall

Adjacent to a vast store of knowledge, the icy climate of the north comes out in full in Alcuin. The library’s quiet solemnity rubs off somewhat on this college and much like the brothers of the wall, most seem to be consumed by duty. Whilst beating off the Wildings of YSJ may be considered above and beyond, this should be the first line of defence.

Hes East – Slaver’s bay

A distant land with three major destinations? Check. A foreign climate in which only the strongest may survive? Check. A fiery queen with great and terrible beasts under her command? Well the ducks count for half of that. To many, Heslington East is an exotic, foreign and beautiful location. While dragons roam Salver’s Bay, burning and killing as they please, so too do the Geese of Hes East, they can frequently be found with hate filled eyes surveying their domain.

Vanbrugh – Dragonstone

An ancient building, almost constructed by the ancients, both Vanbrugh and Dragonstone can boast of dismal interior design and awful temperatures. Similar to Dragonstone, Vanbrugh is surrounded by a vast inhospitable body of water, totally rejecting all forms of carbon based lifeforms.  Furthermore, the traditional seat of the Targaryen heir to the throne was Dragonstone. On a similar note, Mille Beach former chair of Vanbrugh lies biding her time until she can assume her place atop the YUSU throne.

Halifax – Highgarden

The vast tracts of land and serfs owned by the Tyrells pales in comparison to the pure number of students stuffed into Halifax halls. The Tyrells can often be found infesting Kings Landing, and so too can Halifax students be seen far far north of their natural habitat. Some may blame this on lectures, or compulsory seminars. The Tyrells may be attempting to take over Kings Landing, Halifax students intend to act likewise and take over the whole of campus.

James – Casterly Rock

Much like the Lannisters have been characterised as prideful and ambitious, this can be reflected in James College. If you don’t believe me, just look at JCNC and the rest of their sports teams. Indeed, while for the most part it may appear to be a beautiful work of architecture, it too has it’s dark sides, think ‘Prison Block’ if you want a specific example.

Wentworth – Dorne

The often forgotten Wentworth, full of alluring older students (Oberyn was at least 40) and elderly members of the student community who much like Doran give the impression of consummate power and intelligence. Plus I’m fairly sure they don’t have a fresher’s week (AKA Grand Tourney) and instead spend their time consuming potions of a mysterious nature.