Sex, solo self-care and sanitiser: How have the singletons of Sheff been keeping?

Your one and only source into the scandalous lives of the Steel City’s singletons

Picture this. It’s a cold, rainy Sunday in Sheffield. You’re hungover, feeling sorry for yourself and have no one to cuddle. Yes, we’ve all been there.

But now throw a global pandemic into the scene. Put a ban on mixing households and add Matt Hancock’s selfish rule of no casual sex and you have the epitome of being a single student in 2020 – depressing, isn’t it?

Dating and finding love at university is never an easy task. For those of you in healthy relationships – well done, you can stop reading here. For the majority who have continued, we are oh so very single.

And if the constant battle of dodging f*ck boys, awkward Tinder dates, and the dreaded ‘talking stage’ wasn’t enough, we now have another month-long lockdown to make the search for a suiter that bit harder.

To keep us all entertained in lockdown 2.0, The Sheffield Tab wanted to get an inside scoop into the scandalous lives of the Steel City singletons. We became our very own Gossip Girl and asked single students how they have been coping during the pandemic so far.

Have students had sex during lockdown? Is catching coronavirus worse than catching an STI? Are Sheffield students thriving in the single lane or chomping at the bit for a session of Netflix and Chill?

From sex and solo self-care to pandemic pulling techniques and cheesy chat up lines, we found out all the juicy Sheffield gossip.

Let’s talk about sex, baby

Let’s talk sex. After an oversharing poll on The Sheffield Tab’s Instagram, we can reveal that coronavirus is affecting the sex lives of our students – only 44 per cent of single students said that they’d had intercourse since March.

One female student from Uni of told The Sheffield Tab: “I’m quite anxious about accidentally breaking lockdown rules, they’re quite convoluted and change often so I find it difficult to properly understand them sometimes.”

62 per cent of Sheffield students have chosen solo self-care over sex in order to protect the city and deal with the intense rules.

But, for those singletons that have done the deed during the pandemic, we wanted to know how they managed to under Boris’ ever-changing restrictions.

After speaking to individuals, we found out that pandemic pulling techniques have gotten rather creative.

One TV cabinet, one hill, and a hookup

This, by far, is our favourite hook up story shared. One girl from Uni of was able to secure a hook up with the help of a TV cabinet she found in the street.

yes, this is *that* cabinet

On a drunken walk home from the pub, she and her friends came across an old TV cabinet. They decided to take it back with them. Conveniently, a group of lads offered to help them carry it up the hill to their house.

She told The Sheffield Tab: “Some boys helped us carry it up to my house – one made it the whole way and you know the rest…”

All we’re saying here is, keep your eyes peeled for pieces of furniture on your daily walks.

Would you rather: Coronavirus or an STI?

Even in the height of a pandemic, students seemed to be more concerned about catching an STI than coronavirus. Our poll showed 58 per cent of students were more worried about catching an STI than coronavirus. The concern of safe is sex is promising, but we do need to remember that a global pandemic is still very present.

Finding love in a pandemic

Dating in a pandemic is definitely a task. One guy from Hallam summed up his coronavirus dating experience in three words: “Frustrating, difficult and tedious.”

Another Sheff student told The Sheffield Tab: “At the moment, I have shut off the idea of finding someone new romantically.”

Many students have turned to the standard methods of re-downloading Tinder or sprucing up their Bumble account to cope with the singleness of lockdown. 74 per cent of Sheffield students said that they preferred Tinder over Bumble as a dating app.

One female Uni of student said about her Tinder experience: “The best (or worst) thing to come out of corona is definitely all the virus-themed pick-up lines on Tinder – they always make me laugh.”

She went on to tell us her weirdest Tinder DM received in the pandemic: “An easy and effective way to remember how much distance to keep from other people is to imagine eight average-sized adult horses in a tight circle around you.”

Someone please tell us what this chat-up line means, because we honestly have no idea.

On the other hand, students have been making the most of Sheffield’s outdoor spaces and have tested out socially distanced dates.

One female student from Uni of was happy to share her experience. Let’s just say, it ended in a fortnight of isolation.

“I caught Covid on my first date in seven months”

Excited for her first date in a while, she didn’t think it could go too badly. But one date later and after a boy’s inability to tell her of his coronavirus symptoms, it resulted in a positive test and a 10-day isolation period. Her flatmates were not impressed.

They’re an ex for a reason…

The first week of lockdown 2.0 is nearly over and we feel it’s is only right to reiterate the “they’re an ex for a reason” statement.

Yes, lockdown can be lonely – but this is not a reason to message your ex.

We sadly have to reveal that 59 per cent of Sheffield students from the Instagram poll have messaged an ex of some kind during the pandemic. Let’s not let lockdown 2.0 add to this percentage. If you’re feeling lonely, FaceTime your grandma or download Tinder – don’t message your ex.

It’s not all doom and gloom

Whilst being single in lockdown can have its moments, there are also many benefits. Firstly, you don’t have to be constantly worrying about another human and can put all that energy into bettering yourself.

We’re not saying you have to glow up in the next month, but we are saying you should use lockdown to be selfish and focus on yourself. Being able to slow down and take a breather will come short and few in your lifetime.

One Hallam student told The Sheff Tab: “Lockdown isn’t great but it has given me the free time to sort my health and exercise out as well as start to think about planning my career, as I am in third-year now.”

This is the kind of self-care we like to hear about. Coronavirus may have been the biggest cockblock of the year but, until we can party on West Street again, work on yourself and thrive as a Sheffield singleton.

XOXO, The Sheffield Tab.

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