Engineering students at Notts are categorically the worst people to date and this is why

Why don’t you try engineering yourself a partner x

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Whether it’s chemical, civil, electrical or mechanical, engineering students at Notts are perhaps the kind of student you should be steering clear of in your next Tinder excursion. Realistically, they don’t exactly have the greatest rep for their romantic endeavours, despite placing sixth in The Tab Notts’ ranking of the degrees with the most sex appeal.

These students may have the appeal, but in actuality, with such an intensive course ahead of them, a lot of aspects of their lives get neglected. This spans from music taste and fashion sense to, most importantly, their love lives. With life being a little more data and a little less dates, being involved with an engineer probably won’t be the rom-com story of your dreams, and here’s why:

1. They think doing engineering makes them better than you

First and foremost, if you know a single engineer in Notts you’ll be very aware of the superiority complex that comes along free with the degree. One time an engineer said to me: “one semester of my work is worth more than your whole degree”.

Most engineering subjects are considered to be some of the more difficult degrees, and every single student loves to use this to flex on their peers. That, and you’ll have to get to know the hierarchy of the types of engineering. The easiest way to annoy an engineering student is to ask what type they do, and then reply: “isn’t that the easiest one?”.

If you’re on a first date with an engineer and they start to brag about how much money their future job is going to bring in – run.

2. Your Girlfriend in STEM will constantly remind you that she’s in STEM

The STEM gender gap is particularly felt within engineering courses, and this often amplifies the superiority complex. If you ever find yourself lucky enough to be in the company of one of the few female Notts engineers, chances are you’ll be reminded of their degree at least twice a day. Though they arguably have more of a claim to the superiority, sorry boys.

Spending their entire degree surrounded by men means they manage to bypass the classic engineer issue of talking to the opposite gender, but that’s about all they avoid.

3. No sport can make you cool when CAD is your best friend

You may think that wearing your PlayerLayer to your next lecture on refrigeration will drag your reputation up but you’d be sorely mistaken. How well you play basketball or tennis can never cancel out how lame your degree is. If your morning routine consists of deciding between your quarter zip and your official engineering hoodie, you’re really deciding between taking pride in your lame degree or covering it up.

4. Spending all their days with numbers means they’ve got terrible chat

When your head is so full of trusty calculations, do you really have time to be practicing your next suave pick-up line in time for Crisis? Unfortunately, many engineers traded in any skills from English GCSE for schematic drawings and motors, leaving their latest club pull rather underwhelmed. You might have to adjust your convo to be a little bit more secondary school to be on the same page.

5. They never have any free time

If you’re going to date an engineer, prepare yourself to practically never see them in term time, or over Christmas, or Easter either for that matter. While they may be committed to you, you’ll always be the side-ting to their degree.

With such an intensive degree, any free time really has to be spent effectively. It may mean that seeing you has to coincide with some errand running; who said romance is dead when you get to do your weekly Lidl shop with your engineering sweetheart? When dating an engineer you’ve got to be careful that this doesn’t derail into you cooking for them or washing their bedsheets – someone better call Freud.

6. Despite what you think, they’re actually awful at fixing stuff

If anything, it’d make sense that while dating an engineer you’d be able to make the most out of their skills around the house, building IKEA furniture or fixing the kitchen chair that’s broken four times already this semester. However, you’ll very quickly learn that most engineering students put their work into designing, and actually fixing things is a little less their speed. Though, that creativity is sure to amaze you in some weird student-esque ways.

7. Their fashion sense is questionable

A parade of students in shit shirts at Ocean is hardly an uncommon sight, but one in a full-on dress shirt probably is. If you’ve seen the lesser spotted dress shirt at your favourite Notts club, I’m willing to bet you that the owner was in fact an engineer. I respect the commitment to dressing nicely for the club, and it definitely keeps up with the ‘fashionable and fresh’ in the PRYZM dress code. If a night out is a rare occurrence, I guess I can understand having to put 100% effort in.

8. Engineering socials are not the one

When an engineer at Notts actually does go out instead of pulling another necessary all-nighter, it isn’t exactly the wildest student night you’ve ever seen. Last semester I attended perhaps the worst joint social I’ve ever been to and came up with a game that you can use to pass the time at any collaborative social – which might be necessary if it’s with engineers.

May I introduce: guess the degree. You search the dead dancefloor and pick an unsuspecting victim, and unsurprisingly, guess their degree. Dress shirt in route one? Engineering. Four inch platforms? Liberal Arts. Bonus points if you find out what degree they actually do.

Socials really expose the engineers’ fashion sense, which much like their chat is a little bit stuck in the past

9. They think a humanities partner is a free coursework editor

If you’re a humanities student dating an engineering student, you might offer to help edit a lab report or two as a helping hand. This is mistake number one. Reading 100 pages of medieval English can be easier than reading an engineers’ lab report, full of run-on sentences, page-long equations and strictly engineer lingo, I wish you good luck. I still have no idea what a TRASL connector is.

10. An engineering degree is incredibly long

I’ve got an equation for you: engineering degree + placement year + integrated masters = inevitable long-distance relationship. Though this one definitely isn’t a deal-breaker for most students, if you’re not a medic on a similarly insanely long course, EMR will inevitably rinse your bank account.

In all fairness, there are very few engineers that apply to every single stereotype on this list, and Notts is definitely home to some of the sweetest and smartest lot of them. You may have to learn about springs and structures, but engineers really know how to commit themselves to something wholly, even if you have to wait until Summer to spend time with them anywhere other than in George Green.

Related articles recommended by this author:

• A definitive ranking of the UoN degrees with the most sex appeal

• Take this Notts habits quiz and we’ll tell you if you belong at UoN or Nottingham Trent

• If you wear any of these outfits on Notts’ campus then you need to sort yourself out