If you don’t own these things are you even at Nottingham?

Daddy’s credit card is optional, although preferable


You can say what you like, but there’s a definite *look* that we’re all going for at Nottingham. You might think all you need is a pair of trainers, some topshop jeans and an eyeliner flick.  Or a hair cut like Ryan Gosling, a black puffer and a blonde girl on your arm, but its so much more precise than that.

The chances are if you’re at Notts you definitely own some of these.

A macbook

A sea of little glowing apples greet you whenever you walk into a lecture at Nottingham, staring you down. Not having one is like wearing a badge that says “I’m poor”. Or you do computer science and reject the corporate Apple bullshit.

If you have a pc you can’t sit with us.

spot the mac


Doc Martins, because absolutely nobody else will have a pair.

The shoes cry I love cats and floral dresses but in a kind of ironic way. And the boots, well, you’ve probably got ‘I probably hate you’ in your twitter bio and long for the punk era, solely based on that one Slaves song radio 1 plays once a day. Whichever you choose, you definitely used Mum and Dad’s bank card to purchase these.

Oh, and you might be vegan now you’re at uni and you’ve found yourself, but your leather docs are still acceptable (you hope).

A puffercoat

Whether you’ve got the green urban outfitters one, the pink primark one that no one knew was from primark for a while or the black one that’s like an actual fucking duvet, nothing says UoN like a pufferjacket.

If its down or real fur, you the real OG.

A Pandora ring

Extra points if you got it for your 18th or if its not even your birthstone because you just don’t like the colour of yours. You wear it alongside the ring you got on your gap year that makes your finger a bit green and your casio watch, your hand shows your evolution as a person.

If you’re still wearing the princess one, that is some commitment, well done.

A lace crop top and joni jeans

Ocean? Stealth? Crisis? Even Wigflex tbh. This outfit is the most important one of them all. Every time you’ve not known what to wear, this was the answer.

All black is usually your best bet although throw in a glitter one for special occasions, or a gold one at Christmas just for fun.


An addiction to Hallward’s shit coffee

You don’t even like it, no one likes it. It’s not a real Starbucks, its just not.

Yet, every day at 11am or 3pm you just can’t help yourself. So you join the unrelenting queue and order another latte and hate yourself just that little bit more for wasting £2 once again and feeding that coffee addiction.

Glitter for cirque and caramello

Whether you’re a guy and going for the glitter beard or you’ve got a full glitter eye look that puts Kylie Jenner at Coachella to shame, the tiny pots of glitter you got from ebay make you fit in better than the purple pills that Hugh got you from his mate in Manchester.


A denim jacket

Oversized ofc, your denim jacket is the night out version of that puffer jacket. You can wear it to Stealth or Crisis so its just ideal. It smells like the Ocean carpet and stale smoke because you’ve never washed it but that’s kind of the point, that’s your ~vibe~ now.

Adidas superstars

You bought them in first year and now you don’t really like them but they were expensive and they fit so well and so you don’t really care that even your mum has a pair now.

You’ll have to pry them off my feet when I’m dead.

A fjallraven backpack

For a while herschel reigned supreme on the backpack front, then a smattering of eastpak arrived and finally we settled on Fjallraven, which 90% of people can’t pronounce.

They come in 20 different colours though, so its okay hun, you can still be unique.

A baywatch tshirt

A long-forgotten staple of your fresher’s week wardrobe, your beloved (and hideous) baywatch tshirt is rotting – probably literally because of that damp problem you landlord just won’t fix – in the back of your wardrobe as we speak.

You wore it for that one night at Ocean just like everyone else did when all you wanted was to fit in. But, if you’re one of the people that still wear it in the gym, please stop.

An adidas tracksuit

But the skinny roadman kind. Maybe with a UoN sports hoody to complete the look, or sliders if you’re really going all out.

A bus pass

Who walks to uni? Only savages do that.

*Bonus points for everyone who’s ever instagramed the lake*