Why do Edinburgh boys only do one of these seven club photo poses?

Everyone’s guilty of finger pistols once in a while


The club pic is the trophy one takes home from a night out. It shows our friends on Facebook that we are up to some fun stuff at uni, and helps us paint the perfect picture of us enjoying 'unay life' to the full, the way it should be done.

However, on further examination it appears that the poses we pull in these club pictures tend to either lack meaning, despite what we might think, or they are just slightly ridiculous. It doesn't stop every single person ever doing them though when on the night out.

For instance:

The ones who are armed

A surprising amount of clubbers today appear to have a license to bear arms within the nightclub. They tend to slot themselves on one corner of the dance floor and flaunt their weaponry to the rest of the club-goers for the entire the night.

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Mr Bond: calm, cool, and collected – keeping the other clubbers in line

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Loading ammo beneath the camo

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Armed but calm

The ones with heartburn

Some clubbers manage to make it to the club having remembered their ID, money and phone, but the one thing they forget to bring out with them were their Rennie's. No matter how good the night out is, there is one thing that you can't ignore – heartburn.

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"The pain is actually unbearable"

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Ignoring the problem, hoping it'll go away

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If you look really, really closely, you can actually see the tears

The meaningless hand gang

The beauty of the club pic is that if your ideas run dry, you can do literally ANYTHING with your hands and it will probably pass off as a legitimate pose. Many clubbers find themselves resorting to this, fashioning their hand into some bizarre shape and pulling an angsty face.

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Representing Edinburgh's West End

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That's right pal, there are three of you in the photo, well done you

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The Dead Hand Gang

The ones who are out on the 'Phones 4 U' staff party

These people are sensible, in that they leave their phones at home so they don't end up losing them. However, they clearly don't like being apart from them for too long.

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This guy clearly has a work phone, and a personal phone

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Calling his mate to let him know he's missing the photo opportunity

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This guy is taking calls left, right and centre (in this photo)

The ones who are just happy to be there

These people don't often come out as they usually spend their 3ams in the library, rather than on the dance floor. So, when they do come out, they are simply happy to be there, like a Labrador.

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"9am? What 9am?!"

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"I'm literally having the best night ever, this is so so super great!"

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So new to all of this that he is yet to learn club photo etiquette

The ones who always point

This is a classic one. They don't quite brave the finger guns, so just go for the regular point. What exactly it is that they are pointing at? We don't know, and quite frankly I am unconvinced that they even know themselves.

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Two blind mice

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Slightly off with his aim on this one

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Raise your hand if your mates copied your outfit

The ones who like to offend the photographer

These absolute dudes just fucking love swearing. They think it's the shit. Fucking legends.

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"That is good weed"

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He seems like a genuinely lovely boy

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"You can fuck off pal, you can fuck right off!"

Photo credits: Ben Glasgow – Hector's House, David Wilkinson – Rascals, Neil Stewart – Why Not