The food stands on campus are excellent

Getting fat during exam season has never been so easy


Let’s admit it, our campus is blessed with exceptional food.

In addition to the typical union fair, students have access to some genuinely kick-ass food stands.

Here’s our rundown of the best.

On the Roll

Le wild sausage

Le wild sausage

In a classic display of Germany’s famous sense of humour, the name “On the Roll” is a pun, referring to both the wheeled cart, and the rolls their sausages are served on.

The bratwurst is big (this is what ten inches really looks like ladies) and it’s a damn fine sausage. But the way to eat it is not, ironically enough, on the roll, but cut up and covered in onions, sauce, and curry, roll on the side.

Both the bratwurst and the currywurst are £3.50 – or £5 for an extra large – so there’s really no reason not to go for the currywurst, although it might be advisable to ask them go light on the sauce.

Tupinquim 

the queues can be annoying

the queues can be annoying

Named for an indigenous Brazilian ethnic group that has absolutely nothing to do with crepes, Tupinquim none the less serves up a variety, both sweet and savoury.

The earthy vibes and the words “naturally gluten free” plastered wherever there’s space make it popular among wannabe hippies.

Order a savoury crepe and you’re likely to be offered to make it “spicy” by adding jalapeños and a mango-based hot sauce at no extra cost.

The hot sauce is a nice mixture of sweet and spicy and it’s definitely worth adding, even if you’re not a jalapeño person.

At £4, it was on the more expensive end, but it’s still a good deal.

Be warned though—the crepes take time to prepare and when it’s busy, the wait can be pretty long.

American Burgers

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Located in the capital of Scotland, serving a dish that originated in Germany, and operated by a Bulgarian man called Boris, it’s hard to say what’s so American about the American Burgers stand.

Regardless, it’s the cheapest food stand by a good margin—£2 for a pretty decent quarter pounder.

Half the reason to visit this particular stand though, is the talkative Bulgarian man behind the grill.

It’s difficult to tell when Boris is being serious, and when he’s just having you on.

At various points I’ve heard him explain that whenever he says “I love you” he means “fuck you,” as well as claiming to have once been a translator for the Spanish government, which is believable enough, as he speaks several languages.

While it can be difficult to understand what he’s saying, it’s easy enough to just smile and nod while you wait for your deliciously affordable burger.

Union of Genius Soup Van

The van had disappeared, but here is their restaurant

The van had disappeared, but here is their restaurant

An old van, parked more or less permanently on the northwest corner of George Square, serves as the second location for the popular Union of Genius soup cafe.

Union of Genius offers a selection of soups, shockingly, which change regularly. Their range normally included options like vegan, gluten free, or otherwise meant to cater to hippies and communists.

Pretensions aside, since it’s basically an outpost for an actual cafe with a permanent location, Union of Genius can always be relied upon for restaurant quality food.