Welcome to Cambridge – The Best University In The World

The respected QS World University Rankings table shows the home of Cindies overtaking Harvard to take top spot.

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Cambridge is officially the best university in the world.

The respected QS World University Rankings table shows the home of Cindies overtaking Harvard to take top spot.

And after humiliation in all the main Varsity sports events and an academic battering in the Shanghai Jiao Tong table  last month, the QS table serves as further proof that Cambridge is indeed superior to the Other Place.

Weighting the judgements on academic reputation, employability, citations, staff-student ratio and the internationality of the university, the QS Rankings have won high praise for delivering “the most accurate measure available” for ranking universities.

Cambridge have knocked Harvard off the top for the first time since the league table was introduced by the careers advice company in 2004, while Oxford slipped to sixth, its lowest position since the analysis began.

Tom Phillips, a 2nd year Land Ec from Fitz was full of sympathy for students of the Other Place, admitting: “I just feel sorry for them, having to receive such a sub-standard education. I’d almost rather be at John’s than Oxford.”

Visibly clutching at straws, a 2nd year organ scholar from Oxford questioned the validity of the survey, wondering “how relevant something like this is” and stressing that “the order would be different if, for example, subjects were looked at individually”, presumably before going off to practice a requiem for his admired alma mater.

The overall picture for universities in the UK does appear largely positive, with only the US providing more universities in the Top 50, 100, or 200. Whilst both Edinburgh (22) and Lancaster (182) lost ground in the study, the rise of universities such as Bristol (27) and Leeds (85), and continued presence of places like Imperial (7), KCL (21), and Manchester (30) all suggest that the UK has every reason to brag about its Higher Education system.

However, despite reaching the Top 100 for the first time, Durham’s 92nd place ranking further confirms that the only place in which “Doxbridge” exists is in their imagination.

Graphic: Guardian.co.uk