the ick tinder

‘Apparently that matters’: 28 girls tell us about their *all-time worst* Tinder icks

You look like trouble 🙈


It feels like more people are coupling up than ever – which means so many several single people are undoubtedly wasting their days cry-swiping through dating apps, desperately seeking someone to spend all their time with.

Once you’ve re-downloaded a dating app, you suddenly start to remember all the reasons you deleted it in the first place. The people are weird, the conversations are creepy and – frankly – you feel like you need an hour-long shower after using it.

So, if you’re facing your icks head-on, you’re not alone. And if you’re wondering how to avoid giving someone the ick of death – allow us to be your trusty guide. We got 28 girls to open up about EVERYTHING that gives them the ick on Tinder:

1. ‘Guys posting with their watches’ – Kirsty

“Like why? It’s giving ‘tell me you’re a Tory without telling me you’re a Tory’ vibes.”

2. ‘Listing music with huge dark fruits energy’ – Eleanor

Imagine starting a conversation with someone who likes Pale Waves or Arctic Monkeys, lol.

arctic monkeys is dark fruits music

3. ‘(Insert height here), because apparently that matters’ – Lucy

Such a good idea to act passive aggressive in your dating profile!! That’s really going to get you a shag.

4. ‘When they don’t have a bio’ – Becky

“The same guys will complain girls only ever care about looks… but their profiles only contain photos.”

5. ‘Having Ed Sheeran as their anthem’ – Beth

I couldn’t date someone who wants Thinking Out Loud as their wedding song.

ed sheeran the ick on tinder

6. ‘Boys who call themselves architects when they’re not’ – Eleanor

Niche, but somehow incredibly relatable?

7. ‘When they ask for your Snapchat right off the bat’ – Alice

First of all, NO-ONE above 21 should be using Snapchat. Send your nudes over WhatsApp like a grown-up.

8. ‘I’m 22 not 24 haha don’t know why it says that’ – Lucy

If you can’t understand a basic concept like setting your age correctly, how can I trust you to plan a date?

9. ‘Opening with ‘hello trouble’ – Hannah

Too much trouble for you – bye hun.

the ick on tinder

Photo via Unsplash before edits

10. ‘Only posting group pics so you’re left to figure out which one they are’ – Hannah

I’ve been caught out by this so. Many. Times.

11. ‘Having a list of what they *don’t* like in their bio’ – Eleanor

Guaranteed they’re the ones always complaining they have no matches.

12. ‘Slicked-back hair’ – Danni

“It’s so ’80s and just… doesn’t suit you, my love.”

13. ‘Someone once said they didn’t want anyone above a 32-inch waist’ – Sophie

It’s fine – my 36 waist would be too much woman for you, anyway.

14. ‘Having ‘full-time homeowner’ in their bio’ – Megan

Kirsty Allsopp, is that you???

15. ‘When they flex about being a red flag’ – Emily

We’re not Megan Fox and Machine Gun Kelly darl, go away.

16. ‘Rugby players’ – Georgia

To be fair – she’s talking about the ones who say, “I love chasing eggs” in their bios.

rugby players

Photo via Unsplash

17. ‘Pics in front of their cars – as if I’m going to swipe right on a Corsa’ – Alana

“It’s an instant no from me, straight away.”

18. ‘When he writes a poem for you in his first message’ – Aish

I would’ve settled for a simple “hey, how are you?” but okay Wordsworth.

19. ‘Mirror selfies with their trousers round their ankles’ – Amelia

No-one wants to see your thighs, Darren!!!

20. ‘Photos with their middle finger up’ – Katherine

“It just screams they haven’t matured since like, year eight.”

21. ‘When their first message is a gif’ – Courtney

Seriously, though – what are you actually meant to reply to that?

22. ‘Disliking pizza toppings isn’t a personality trait, btw’ – Amelia

Yes, I like pineapple on pizza. No, I’m not going to make a thing about it.

pineapple on pizza

Photo via Unsplash

23. ‘When they only have one photo and it’s of their car’ – Kiran

“Didn’t realise you were a transformer.”

24. ‘Three words: WHITE SKINNY JEANS’ – Diana

To each their own.

25. ‘Assuming where I’m from and messaging me in random languages’ – Rina

Psst. That’s racist.

26. ‘Too many photos with their mum’ – Sophie

Tell us you’re still getting breastfed without telling us you’re still getting breastfed.

27. ‘Graduation pics’ – Ellie

We get it, you’ve got a degree. Same.

graduation pic

28. ‘When they say ‘6’6 – those are two separate measurements’ – Izzy

As Doris from Gavin and Stacey would say – “don’t go selling me the whole farm.”

Related stories recommended by this writer:

Featured image via Pexels before edits.