The A to Z of thoughts every student has had during lockdown three

We’re now officially 22 days into the UK’s third national lockdown. Although not much has changed for uni students in respect to remote online learning, we’re all still struggling to accept that this is our new-found reality for the next while. Since uni recommenced last September, every single day has felt like a repeat of the same day over and over again and it’s becoming more difficult to get ourselves hyped for the end of yet another cycle of being trapped at home. So, here’s the A to Z of all thoughts every student across the UK has had during lockdown three.

At least I’m saving money because the pubs and clubs are shut

You tell yourself as an attempt to find at least one good aspect about another lockdown. Imagine all the money you’ve saved on buying drinks since last year. Long gone are the days of waking up with a bin bag next to your bed, finding out you bought four rounds of Jägerbombs for strangers and regretting sharing twelve stories to your Instagram loudly singing along to ‘Heatwave’ by Wiley.

Bottle of wine anyone?

Whether it’s a weekend and you’re drowning away your sorrows, or it’s just an excuse to celebrate the mundane tasks of everyday life like not having missed a single online seminar today – get that bottle of Tesco’s finest wine out, you deserve it.

Confirm Asos order? Yes please

Why are we still online shopping in a pandemic and why does it fill us with so much joy? You know that you won’t be able to show off those cool new trousers to anyone but your housemates, but one can dream.

Do I really need to get dressed today?

When’s the last time you washed your dressing gown? Be honest.

“Excited to walk to the shops today”

You know you’ve hit rock-bottom when the walk to the shops becomes your highlight of the day… at least it kind of counts as cardio because you’re getting steps in, right?

Fuck it, let’s get a Deliveroo

Browsing through Deliveroo has become almost as common as scrolling through Instagram because there’s absolutely nothing else to do. Lord save my soul, and my waistline.

God, please give me the strength to finish my assignments

Never have I ever been so unmotivated to do uni work in my life. Drink.

How have I watched everything on Netflix?

“Are you still watching?” Yes Netflix, I am.

Influencers suck

Between trips to Dubai, preaching about productivity and claiming that influencers are “key-workers”. Give us a break – it’s officially time to unfollow influencers.

Jesus Christ, I just want to boogie

Re-creating club nights in the various rooms of your uni house might be fun, but it’s just not the same is it? Sad reacts only.

Kidnap me and take me to New Zealand

Seeing people in New Zealand live their best lives at concerts and going on nights out truly is a new level of FOMO. If anyone wants to kidnap me and take me there DM me, I’ll send you my address.

Let’s get dressed up to sit in the lounge

Who knew that getting dressed up to sit in the lounge and have a couple of tinnies with your housemates could feel so therapeutic? Although, this has made me realise that wearing jeans for more than three hours is definitely criminal.

Meltdown #58 pending

You wouldn’t be a true uni student if you didn’t shed at least a couple of tears every now and again. But try and remember that every day is one day closer to life returning to normal… [cries in Spanish].

Not another day of doing the same thing all over again

Every single day feels like a repeat of the day before and frankly, we’re bored of it. Wake up, breakfast, uni work, lunch, uni work, dinner, Netflix, sleep. When will it end?

“Oh no, is that really what I look like?”

You ask yourself as you catch a glimpse in the bathroom mirror at 4pm still wearing your pyjamas you’ve not taken off in three days.

Probably too late to take a nap

No but really, when is too late to take a nap?

Quaranting anyone?

We could fill the void in our lives by chatting for weeks and making plans to hang out one day when lockdown is over… only to get bored and inevitably never speak again.

Really can’t be arsed anymore

This is as self-explanatory as it gets.

Should I re-download Tinder?

Swiping through Tinder is a good way of passing time, but what’s the point? It’s not like you can do anything anyway and frankly, there is absolutely nothing to talk about. “Wyd?” “Nothing u?” “Same”.

Tiktok is ruining my life

My parents would be so ashamed if they saw my screen time and more specifically, how many hours I spend scrolling through Tiktok every day.

Ugh does anyone want to drive to big Tesco just to feel something?

Big Tesco > anywhere else. It’s kind of like going to IKEA and browsing through Swedish-named furniture for hours, but even more fun.

Valentines day who?

Not that you would have a date anyway, but knowing that you definitely won’t be asked out by anyone this year is still a bummer.

What day is it?

Life’s a breeze when every day could be a Friday.

X

X stands for kisses, and particularly the pout face you make in the mirror when you’re inevitably having your second mini-breakdown of the week.

“You’re joking, not another one?”

Our thoughts exactly every time the BBC notification comes through that BoJo is holding another press conference.

Zoom will be the death of me

The sexual tension between you and the bright red ‘end’ button in every online lecture, seminar, or God forbid Zoom quiz (if you’re still participating in those we want nothing to do with you) is astronomical. The day we get to finally delete the Zoom app from our laptops will be groundbreaking.

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