There are five definitive ‘love languages’, this is what they are

They define how you give and receive love

4 years ago

Are you the sort of person who falls head-over-heels in love as soon as someone offers to make you dinner? Or does it take someone to literally spell it out for you before you have any inkling they’re into you? However you feel, it’s all down to the different love languages – which may get you looking at your love life in a whole new light.

The five love languages are outlined in the book of the same name by Gary Chapman. The book shares five ways to express and experience love between partners, defined as the “love languages”. To find your love language you have to explore the way you give and receive love, and what makes you happy in a relationship and feel as though you are being appreciated.

But what even are the different love languages? What do they mean? What does it say about you? Here’s a guide to the five love languages and everything you need to know.

These are the five love languages:

Words of affirmation

Words of affirmation means you feel and express love through your speech. For example, being told you love one another, compliments or sharing your feelings verbally. Someone sharing their thoughts and talking to you is what makes you feel most loved and appreciated.

Acts of service

Acts of service means you rely more on people doing things for you to show love. For example, you may appreciate someone making you dinner or helping you with something. You are very much an “actions speak louder than words” kind of person.

Receiving gifts

Receiving gifts is quite a self explanatory love language. It means a meaningful present makes you feel loved and appreciated in a relationship. This could be anything from a grand gesture to getting you some flowers when you feel down.

Quality time

The quality time love language is all about having the undivided time of your significant other. You measure feeling loved through the amount of times you spend together and the memories you have built up. Someone with a quality time love language wants the attention of their significant other as much as possible. It means a lot more to you to be doing important things together too, not just physically together. You want time without distractions – for example a romantic trip over sitting on the sofa watching TV.

Physical touch

The final of the five love languages is physical touch. If this is your primary language you care most for the physical aspect of a relationship. You feel most loved when your partner kisses or hugs you, for example, and you seek assurance through touch.

Now, if you’re not sure which relates most to you, find out what your primary love language is in this quiz here.