How to smash out your diss in less than two weeks, by the heroes who did it

Personal hygiene is at the bottom of the list


We know why you're reading this. It's a dark place. You've left your dissertation to the last minute, after promising yourself and your mates you wouldn't.

Now there's no choice but to complete those dreaded 10,000 words in the next two weeks.

Luckily, people have been there before. We spoke to some folklore heroes who have completed their dissertation in less than two weeks, for the ultimate guide on how they did it.

Prepare for loss of sleep and lots of caffeine

Criminology student, Alex Conda, managed to complete her dissertation in an impressive 15 hours.

She recommends being in a stress free state of mind and says: "You will need caffeine and not minding loss of sleep."

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Do the bit you want to do the least, first

Alex recommends to not avoid the bit you least want to do and says: "Get that out of the way!"

Choose a topic you already have passion for

Make sure you are already confident and passionate about what you are going to write, it will make it easier and you will know what you want to discuss.

Alex stated: "My main strategy then was to write the bits I knew most about first and then start finding sources for things I needed more info on."

Lighten the mood with some comedy and company!!

Throughout the 15 hours, Alex had It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia on loop to lighten the mood.

She says: "I would recommend a show that you've already seen so you don't get distracted."

People on her Instagram and her housemates were also there to help her through the pain.

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PLAN YOUR WORK

Media Production student, Wesley Callison lost his dissertation two days before hand in by accidentally deleting it off his desktop.

After completing it in 27 hours, he says that planning is essential to smash it out.

Wes says that planning is not a waste of time as some might think: "If you have a plan on what to write about rather than going off the top of your head, you'll type much quicker."

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Cover your word count

Having your word count there is not beneficial, and covering it helps you to focus on writing loads in a short space of time.

Wes recommends covering your word count with a piece of tape or paper: "You don't need to see it often and it’s more distracting than helpful, just write!"

Have essential tea breaks

Having breaks and sleeping when you can is essential to ensure you do not have a complete breakdown.

Wes says you have to earn your breaks though:"Make sure you have earned it. There's a difference between taking a break and procrastinating!"

Get those micro meals ready

Eating wise, Wes suggests quick easy meals, and not being afraid to ask your flatmates for help. Also plenty of tea and coffee.

Pick music you don't mind hating afterwards

Throughout he listened to chilled lo-fi hip hop beats on Youtube, but says: "I can't stand that music now."

Back up your work on different devices

"Save your fucking work. Lots. Everywhere."

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If really short on time, do the whole thing in one day

Current record holder Brianna Delgado completed her dissertation in an incredible 14 hours after losing her previous version off her Google Drive and hard drive.

She says that if you need to finish your dissertation in a short amount of time just write the entire 10,000 words in one day.

"Just write, get a feeling for what 10k words means, and what it feels like to complete that kind of essay.

"Like a body, my strategy for essays was always write what you know first and then start applying readings, sources, materials to hold up the "bones" and layer until you complete the "body" so to speak."

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Drink zero-calorie energy drinks

Brianna drank seven zero-calorie energy drinks in the 14 hours of her completing her dissertation.

Don't mix these with coffee though…

Listen to whatever motivates you

After sitting in silence for the the first six hours to concentrate, Brianna gave in to some classical music and says: "Vivaldi is pretty damn motivational."

Take good care of yourself

She recommends paying attention to yourself and drinking less alcohol: "The better you eat and the more you take care of yourself physically and mentally, the more energy you'll have for the important things like getting a degree."

Think of the future

According to Brianna, her grade was "garbage" but she's still managed to get an amazing job.

"Learn from your mistakes uni's a beast that really teaches you a lot."

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There's literally no way you can fail now.

Good luck.