A genuinely useful list of stuff you need to take to a festival

Festival prep is amongst the most exciting and stressful things one will ever go through. The fear of being stuck in a field, cursing yourself for not have a chair to rest your weary body after a night of dancing. Of course it’s all worth it, but we have compiled an extensive list of items you need to elevate your festival experience from fun to flawless. We’ve even provided links so you don’t even have to trawl the shops for it.

So without further ado, here are our genuinely and actually useful festival hacks to save you any stress this summer.

Hand sanitiser

Without sounding too much like your mama, hygiene is key. Chuck some hand sanitiser in your bum bag and be, to a reasonable extent, the pinnacle of health after days of using sub-human toilets.

Face/body wipes

For when the festival showers are just not an option (or simply non-existent), face and body wipes can be a god send. For grubby gals everywhere wipes can be the secret to a sweet-smelling bod, three days down. Baby wipes are also pretty much the only thing that will even remotely get rid of glitter.

Painkillers

Don’t buy branded ones – you can get them from supermarkets for 16p and they’re the same thing. It’s a con.

Suncream

Particularly relevant for you ginger souls out there, sun cream can be the difference between looking turnt or looking burnt.

Airbed

Comfort is key when you’re camping for days on end. Let’s face it, festivals are so much more enjoyable after a decent night’s sleep. Get an airbed and sleep like a queen.

Camping chairs

Don’t be the one asking to sit on someone’s lap. You’ll need a chair for your downtime, especially if it rains. You can get them with a carry back for £8. Tip: make sure you put your chairs hidden away in your tent when you leave the campsite – chair thieves are among the crowd.

Picnic blanket

Should there be a battle for the chairs, or – god forbid – someone stole yours, make sure you bring a trusty picnic blanket.

A gazebo

Whether you’re sheltering from the sun or the rain, a gazebo is an essential place to act as a base. You can get them for twenty quid and are relatively easy to put up if you have enough people to help.

A tent

I hate to point out the obvious here, but people have been known to forget this essential item – relying on friends or simply leaving it at home. Bring a pop-up tent and sit and have a cider whilst everyone else battles with tent poles. If you’re balling or there are loads of you, buy a fancy bell tent – sure, it’s £200 but between ten of you that’s a twenty each, and you will be the kings of every festival you attend going forward.

A sleeping bag

A sleeping bag is essential – even if you think it’s warm, we’re in England, and it will get cold.

A collapsible water bottle

For maximum stealth points and a considerably cheaper weekend, a collapsible water bottle is key. Hell, you can even get them with Disney Princesses on them!

Dry shampoo

Stuff of legend, there’s really no better way to keep your locks fresh at a festival. What’s more, you can even get scented versions to mask the lingering odour of that joker’s beer.

A little first aid kit

It may seem excessive, but when you have trodden on a tent peg in the dark, you’ll be happy to have disinfectant wipes and plasters. This kit has 57 pieces for £2.95.

A drawstring bag/rucksack

To carry around your (collapsible) bottle of booze, your phone and your purse.

Shewee

We’d be lying if we claimed to have never felt a pang of jealousy in regards to the ease at which boys can relieve themselves wherever they wish. With a Shewee you can have this luxury. Let’s face it, anything’s better than withstanding the fragrant Eau-de-portaloo the second day of the festival.

Dioralyte

Medicine of miracles, elixir of God’s, Dioralyte has the power to save you from a stinking hangover, dehydration (and even diarrohea).

Vaseline

Arguably a life essential, Vaseline will keep your lips smooth and your festival look complete. You can also use it to apply glitter.

Gems and glitter

Add a little sparkle to your look with some gems and glitter. Top tip: use eyelash glue for extra stick, else you’ll be spending the whole time scrabbling for gems in the mud.

Wavy make up

Go nuts and get some rogue makeup, like silver lip foil.

Hair ties for plaits

Another hair hack, another solution to the inevitable bedhead hair. When faced with sub-zero showers or hair resembling that of Brigitte Bardot in her later years, this hairdo is the answer to all your prayers. French plaits are particularly effective. You can use clear bands to secure them.

Metallics

Not only will a shimmer of gold, silver or bronze give you an air of festival royalty, a little glitz to your garms will make you easier to spot in a crowd.

An upper-ear earring

Add a finishing touch to your festy look with  little hoop on your upper ear – you can even get involved if you don’t have it pierced.

Hayfever tablets

Even if you don’t personally suffer from the dreaded disease that makes so many noses itch and eyes run, you’ll be a life saver to that poor sod who forget their’s. Bring hayfever tablets and dish them out – it will be a lifetime bond of gratitude in the making.

Herbal sleeping tablets

Homeopathy is not to be underrated. Indeed, nature’s remedies can be equally as efective as a cheeky Valium to ensuring a good night’s rest.

Earplugs

Essential for ensuring a sweet and peaceful slumber, these babies will allow you to sleep through the racket made by those “oh so cool” all-night ravers two tents down. You can also get filtered earplugs to take out the damaging sound in the music – you can still hear the song crystal clear, if not better.

Deodorant

Stinking of body odour is never going to facilitate making those lifetime bonds so many people ramble on about post-festival. Especially when showers aren’t a feasible option, deodorant could quite easily be the deciding factor between a lonely weekend or one to remember.

A mirror

Something you wouldn’t think of – but day three doing your eyeliner one-handed in a mirror, you’ll be hating yourself for not bringing one.

Hairspray or hair gel

For securing stray hairs or fixing on your painstaking makeup efforts, hairspray is a multifunctional hack, not to be missed.

Likewise, hair gel can help keep those locks looking fine, and simultaneously serve as an excuse for your rather greasy looking hair.

Toothbrush and toothpaste

Like deodorant, this hygienic toothbrush-toothpaste combo have the power to determine how successful your weekend is. Let’s face it, there’s nothing nicer than the sweet flavour of toothpaste to wash away last night’s lingering odour.

Booze

For maximum alcohol to drunkness ratio, Vodka is advisable. With its sharp odour and consequent burn, you’ll be festival level in no time.

If, on the other hand, you favour a sweeter flavour, Rekorderlig Passionfruit cider is there to ease the burn of its harsher alcoholic cousin. You can even use it as a mixer for added alcohol intake.

Food

If you were never unlucky enough to put yourself through gruelling hours of Duke of Edinburgh Award, it’s entirely possible you could have missed out on these bad boys. But, truly, you haven’t lived until you experience their ‘healthy’ goodness.

A bum bag

Easy access and not that nerdy any more, the leather bum bag is a festival essential.

Loo roll

Bringing loo roll with you serves a two purposes: for when the loo roll runs out, and also to block the smell of the disgusting portaloos.

Portable phone charger

This Mophie case doubles up as a charger. When you run out, switch it on and you get an extra eight hours of battery – simples.

Torch

A torch is an absolute essential – or you could go rogue with a head torch. Your friends may mock you but you’ll be the one laughing when everything in your eye line is illuminated.

Waterproof jacket

Let’s face it, ‘ideal’ festival weather of British-ly moderate sunny skies, without a cloud in sight are probably a 50/50 chance. In order to put the risk of hypothermia and consequent misery at bay a pack-away waterproof can prove to be a life send when the heavens begin to pour.

Drybag for your phone

It happens to the best of us. It’s raining in true British festival style and your once pristine iPhone emerges from your pocket dripping with condensation. Its unimaginable fate is soon learned by your relentless, but nevertheless, unsuccessful attempts to resuscitate it. Avoid such horrors with this simple yet effective hack.

Jumper

Another way to ward of the possibility of contracting hypothermia, a jumper (like this fake Golf Wang one) can provide solace and comfort in your most desperate hungover moments.

Garms

Festivals are notorious for being a rather messy affair, whether you’re simply there for the day or the long stint, it’s advisable to invest minimum dollar in some garms to avoid tears at the sight of your formerly white fave vest. You can get ridiculously cheap garms online.

Sunnies

Reflective sunglasses are the trend of summer 2016, don’t get caught squinting without them.

Shorts

Rain or shine, shorts are not to be left at home. It’s logical really, if it’s sunny you can maximise the leg tan and keep cool, if it’s pouring, there’s simply less material to painstakingly wait to dry out. Never underestimate the beauty of clean socks.

Socks

An often under appreciated component of one’s daily life, the humble sock not only provides comfort in times of rubber related need but also helps to keep your feet and a considerably more socially acceptable level of stinky.

Sandwich bags

The humble sandwich bag is not to be underestimated. Indeed, it is a highly versatile addition to your much deliberated festival gear. With the power to serve as an alcohol smuggling device, to put in dirty underwear or even to keep that sandwich uber fresh (not at the same time), this baby isn’t to be forgotten.

Bucket hat

This 90’s fashion staple is, arguably, making a comeback. What’s more, it actually provides you with some pretty decent sun coverage, to keep sun stroke at bay.

Wellies 

Normally this would go without saying but increasingly nowadays it seems that some girls haven’t got the memo. They may give you an extra inch or two’s advantage when you’re craning your neck to catch a glimpse of your favourite band, but in reality there is nothing sassy about sporting your new wedges – especially when navigating mud pools and mosh pits. Get some silver hunters to keep up with the metallic trend this year (or go slightly cheaper with these).

So there you go, have fun – and do it in style.