Street Marshalls are ‘a step closer’ to action

The infamous street marshall scheme gripping Looga is “a step closer” to implementation according to locally produced propaganda.

“My Southfields”, a leaflet of student hatred, is distributed to residents in Luff on behalf of the electors in the Loughborough ward.

The Spring 2015 leaflet says: “As a consequence of the intense campaigning by local Southfields councillor Ted Parton a street marshall scheme to address the problem of late-night noise and anti-social behaviour is coming close to being introduced.”

It was proposed at the beginning of the new year for the streets of Loughborough to be patrolled by reluctant student bouncers.

But Ted Parton said: “I hope that the trial scheme – using students – works but if it fails then at least it opens up the way for a proper system of street marshalls to be introduced.”

The Bible of buzzkill adds: “It has taken a lot of time and effort persuading those in authority that it was an issue for many Southfields residents and it was one that could be solved by street marshalls.

“Fortunately the police, our excellent local MP Nicky Morgan and the leader of Charnwood Council were early supporters and more recently resident groups have come on side.”

But who will foot the bill?