This is exactly how tall Tory MPs are, because you’ve obvs been dying to know

When casting your vote over who should be running our country, how tall each MP is probably isn’t a deciding factor. It’s only when you seem them strutting their stuff down the Downing Street catwalk on the way to Number 10 does it cross you mind.

Are they short? Tall? Would they lie about their height in their online dating profiles?? This is exactly how tall your favourite Cabinet minsters are, because I know you’ve always wondered:

Rishi Sunak (previous chancellor of the exchequer)

Height: 5’6

Rishi Sunak’s true height was extremely surprising. In photographs, he always seems to tower over his peers, making you believe he was surely around six foot. But no.

According to LadBible, the brazen individual is only 5’6. Yes, 5’6. A senior MP even suggested BoJo has been appointing taller MPs in an effort to annoy Rishi. Poor lad.

Boris Johnson (disgraced tory prime minister)

Height: 5’9

Another short king. As if being pushed out of his role as Prime Minister wasn’t bad enough, BoJo has to walk around at a mere 5’9. If he had Hinge he’d be the type to round his height up to six foot.

This hasn’t stopped the blonde bombshell from reigning in three marriages and fathering seven children all before the age of 60. How scandalous.

Priti Patel (the unhomely home secretary)

Height: 5’3

Ms Patel stands at a measly 5’3, Britain’s average height for a woman. An average height for a less than average lass. I would not invite this home secretary into my house.

Mark Spencer (I don’t know what he does)

Height: 5’8 (maybe)

Mark Spencer, the former chief whip, has only been included because I thought his name was entertaining. I wonder if he knows Percy Pig. Unfortunately, his official height is not public knowledge, so I tried tweeting him, to no avail. In my opinion, however, I would say he stands at around 5’8.

Sajid Javid (former health secretary)

Height: 5’10

Matt Hancock’s shoes were big ones to fill, but all 5’10 of Sajid Javid did so quite well. Until he resigned. Twice.

He does actually look a lot shorter in photos. Perhaps I was distracted by his shiny head.

Michelle Donelan (former education minister)

Height: 6’0

Michelle Donelan is a beast. Standing at a whopping six foot tall she towers over BoJo and Rishi. I hope they feel emasculated. Keep girl bossing tall queen.

Nadhim Zahawi (chancellor)

Height: 6’0

Coming in also at six foot, Nadhim is twinning with Michelle – how cute. I wonder if they share clothes. Zahawi wasted no time with getting a promotion after Rishi quit, moving up from education secretary to chancellor.

Dominic Raab (deputy PM/BoJo’s official sideman)

Height: 5’9

Dominic Raab and myself are exactly the same height. The only single difference between the two of us is that I’m an Oxbridge reject and he went to the prestigious uni.

Jacob Rees-Mogg (Brexit diehard)

Height: 6’2

Moggy is a lanky guy. He looks like an extra in a 1940s Disney cartoon. I’m convinced he’s not a real person.

Michael Gove (father of 420bandobaby)

Height: 6’5 (apparently)

Mr Gove claims that he stands at a whopping 6’5. I do not believe this, he is definitely giving short king energy.

Nadine Dorries (got famous from I’m A Celeb)

Height: 5’4

Nadine’s political position is irrelevant, she is an ex I’m A Celeb contestant. As a Conservative MP, her greatest achievement is eating some bugs in Australia.

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