‘Do unis have lots of sex parties?’: What this year’s freshers really want to know

They’ve got a lot of questions and not all of them make sense

There’s a cloud of uncertainty hanging over uni for this year’s freshers. Will they have face-to-face lectures? Will uni be safe? Are there lots of sex parties?

Desperate for these answers, incoming freshers have been airing their hilarious questions about uni life on Google and in the deepest recesses of the Student Room forums.

From people worried about smelling BO, to wondering if they should be “loud and bubbly” in lectures, here are the best ones.

‘What is freshers’

Please imagine the pure horror on the face of the person who only learned what Freshers’ is three weeks before it happens.

‘Do masks filter out BO?’

In fairness, this is a pretty practical question.

Great Google double whammy here: ‘When will nightclubs open?’ and ‘What is freshers flu?’

This is what everyone’s concerns should be, in that order. Although it’s hard to escape the impression that a non-negligible number of students are worried that ‘freshers flu’ is just an old-timey word for COVID.

Really rate this. Great energy

So it turns out this was about someone wanting to practice their singing

‘I’m not happy I’m being marked so leniently’

I genuinely cannot believe that’s real.

‘Do unis have lots of sx parties?’

This really speaks for itself.

‘Should I be super loud and bubbly in lectures??’

Absolutely do not do this.

If this is a concern, admit defeat now

That’s my tip for sharing a kitchen. That’s it.

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Featured image: MNB – Monday Night Bridge, Oxford