A definitive ranking of the most unbearable YouTube couples
They’re all awful tbh
There are certain things in this world that are facts of life. Two plus two is four, the sky is blue, and YouTubers are the most unbearable breed of human beings to have ever walked this earth. But there is nothing more unbearable than a YouTube couple.
YouTubers capitalise on perfect representation of their life, so the perfect relationship is an inevitable part of their façade. But the time when people actually cared about YouTubers and their relationships has passed, leaving only under-14s who still think Zoella is cool.
We've ranked the most unbearable YouTube couples, from the tear your hair out awful to the almost tolerable:
Zoe Sugg and Alfie Deyes – 10/10
To nobody's surprise Zoella and Alfie Deyes are easily the most unbearable couple on YouTube, if not the UK. They are a walking talking nightmare who prove you don't need talent to be rich and famous. Watching a "Zalfie" video is like drinking a glass of milk and then throwing up. Bland and unpleasant.
Classic Zalfie content includes awkward relationship quizzes to see who knows the other better, with questions like "I'm going to the shop to buy you a treat, what do I get you." There's endless make up challenges and vlogs of themselves playing Sims.
One video shows the couple struggling to make cupcakes, because it is adorable when 20-something year olds don't have basic culinary skills. Their videos are accompanied by soul crushing elevator music, slowly sending you insane, which is probably how they amassed their following.
Jenna Marbles and Julien Somilita – 9/10
Another addition to the hall of fame of cringe YouTube couples are Jenna Marbles and Julien Somilita. They are a peak example of YouTubers creating a brand on being edgy and awkward.
It's all a little predictable isn't it? Jenna's giving her boyfriend acrylic nails and Julien guiding her through a make up tutorial, again. Yawn. Next.
PewDiePie and Marzia Bisognin – 8/10
PewDiePie to date has 96,707,439 subscribers and a net worth of $20 million. He is the most popular YouTuber of all time. His content is based on video games. While PewDiePie and Marzia Bisognin aren't as mind-numbing as Zalfie, they're still easily one of the most unbearable couples on YouTube due to their quirky and fetishised 'cool chick meets nerd vibe'.
Classic videos include "Are we ready to get married?", because naturally the way to make a massive life decision like that is to ask your adolescent followers. When they aren't questioning their relationship, they're picking out each others clothes, and annoying each other on camera, which somehow people find endearing. To make matters worse, the videos are always edited with awkward zoom ins of PewDiePie's face as he stares blankly at the camera.
The Saccone Jolys – 7/10
The Saccone Jolys are one of many YouTube families who have made a living from daily videos of themselves, their four children and six dogs. If you ever needed convinced that 1960s family stereotypes are still alive and well, this channel is every affirmation you could possibly need.
Content includes anything and everything that is middle class, like their nanny leaving, them decorating their new home and house shopping with "no budget".
And if this wasn't insufferable enough, documenting your children's entire lives on the internet before they are able to understand it is problematic. The whole thing is weird, like a Black Mirror episode.
Madeline and Stephen – 6/10
If you were to pull out every hair on your head one by one, it would still be more enjoyable than watching Madeline and Stephen's YouTube channel. While they only have 300,000 subscribers, they deserve an honourable mention because of how unbearable they are. Aged 19 and 21, this American couple have their own apartment and are engaged. We haven't even started paying off our student loans yet.
Videos include: "I want to break up prank," "Catfishing my boyfriend to see if he cheats", and "Farting in front of my boyfriend prank", so if you feel like having a migraine head to their channel because you're guaranteed one.
Tanya Burr and Jim Chapman – 5/10
Now divorced, Tanya Burr and Jim Chapman were essentially a slightly less popular version of Zoella and Alfie Deyes. They made their relationship into a franchise to be swooned at by adolescent girls, with endless vlogs documenting their bland day-to-day. Their YouTube relationship documented a genre of fake happiness, which is both bland and unsettling.
Their saving grace was that they were too boring to be properly unbearable.
Patty Walters and This Be Dottie – 4/10
Patty Walters and This Be Dottie – the couple to make all the YouTube emos swoon and start to believe in love. They couldn't be more of an unforgivable stereotype if they tried. From filming videos called 'I hate my girlfriend' in onesies, to Patty's awful emo covers, they find peak lame at their discussions about how his girlfriend is beautiful both with and without make up.
Emma Blackery and Luke Cutforth – 3/10
Luke Cutforth and Emma Blackery are one of those special kinds of unbearable Youtube couples, because even though they've broken up, they're still making content together, so their insufferable relationship is like a twilight zone that the internet will never escape from.
They posted a whole video about who they'd broken up but had decided to remain friends, They have a video called 'Reunited with my ex', an abundance of awkward challenges that no one really cares about, and a video by Luke titled 'Punching Emma Blackery in the face', which is uh, interesting.
Marcus Butler and Niomi Smart – 2/10
It's puzzling why there are so many versions of the same YouTube couple. The girl is healthy and into fashion and makeup and the boy is funny. That's essentially all you need to know about Marcus and Niomi. They were a bland recreation of Zalfie, with no original ideas or content.