What’s the most attractive boys’ name?
Freddie won last year
This time last year, we asked you “What’s the fittest name?” – and you answered. With Freddie. And Olivia. Creative, well done.
Now, we’re asking you again, in an even bigger, even better version. We want to see which name you find most attractive during these tempestuous times, so we’re giving you the opportunity to vote below.
Is it Kem? No probably not. Is it Marcel? Getting warmer. Only one can win – choose your pick of the boys below to find out the fittest name of ALL TIME.
Whether you’re an Abhinay or an Abdullah, imagine actually being able to shorten your name to “Abs.” Like, the sexiest part of a man’s anatomy. If only we could have six of you, right?
Adam was made in God’s image, don’t you know, and most Adams nowadays damn well look like it. You wouldn’t not trust the Bible, would you?
Granted, no-one was talking about Aidans much a couple of years ago. Then along came Poldark and James Bond-favourite Aidan Turner, and the Aidans of the world realised that their time was upon them.
Now you can’t picture an Aidan without thinking of robust Irish locks, softly glistening abs and the enchanting glow of a bronze Cornish sunset.
Bowen. Mytton. The Great. Sure, most Alexanders are dickheads, but it doesn’t stop you falling head-over-heels in love with them.
Amir, afar, wherever you are, I believe you’ve the sexiest name. Seriously though, everyone called Amir has fierce, brooding eyes, and usually a good face of stubble to match.
Andrew is going to treat you right, and you know it. He’s got a lovely selection of jackets, probably some nice shoes, and his Mum will invite you to their Sunday roast. If you’re attracted to manners, Andrew is your guy.
Ant, Tony, or Anthony, we all know this guy will get you going. You just want him in your pAnthonys.
Every day when you’re walking down the street, the fittest boys that you’ll meet, will tend to be called Arthur.
Extra points if it’s short for Benedict.
You’re almost certain you’ve met more dogs and mates of your granddad named Bobby than any young fitties named Bobby, but when they come along, oh boy do they come along.
Wavey hair, great rig, expensive sunglasses and a tight T-shirt to match. He’ll have the pick of the girls, but will be too bashful and cute to do anything about it. He will look exactly like his mum, and bring her up too much on first date.
In teen American films, the handsome-but-mean one that everyone fancies is always called Brad. Also, Brad Pitt.
Fuck off, that’s you’re actual name? Like, you’re actually called Byron? Neat.
If the OC was set in England, Seth would be called Cameron.
There’s something authoritative and superior about the name Charles that demands a bit of awe and respect. He’s likely to be a little too posh, but that’ll be a huge part of his charm.
Charlie is just as posh as Charles, and has a signet ring and many, many guns, but he’s just slightly less posh. He’ll most likely change tweed jackets and Crew shirts, for black Levi jeans, and a tight T. Charlie is cheeky, and probably really good in bed.
Don’t we all know a Chris. He’s fit, sporty, and great with the guys. Yeah, sure, he’s a little awkward around girls, but that’s what makes him so fit.
Back in your rebellious school years, you always imagined yourself going out with someone called Conor. He probably had a sick gelled-up quiff, and he probably wore the raddest flame shirt you’d ever seen. He probably even skated.
Well, now Conor’s grown up – so why give up on your dreams?
Conrad probably smokes a cigar and knows how to tie 28 different types of knots. Give it a few years and he’ll have the most impressive ‘tache you’ve ever seen.
Craig’s hotness has been significantly improved by Daniel Craig even though he doesn’t have the same first name.
Daniel to his Mum, Dan to the lads, this guy is a full on all-rounder. He’s sporty, clever, and fit. He’s had the same haircut since GCSEs but it works for him. He went to a really good uni like Durham or Bristol, but also has time to play a decent game of football.
“I saw the angel in the marble and carved until I set him free,” Michelangelo once said – and since his iconic statue, many more angelic Davids have graced this earth.
David Beckham, the second-most attractive man in the world. David Gandy, the most attractive man in the world. David Attenborough, the most attractive voice in the world. Even our ex-Prime Minister who shan’t be named couldn’t ruin it as a name, and that’s saying a lot.
In the smoking area at a midweek Indie night, everyone asks where his partner in crime Ant is, and he always tells them to fuck off.
He’s not the kind of guy to take a joke lightly – Declan is damaged goods. He writes songs, drinks too much coffee, has a little cry every now and again and goes on holiday to Whitby to cleanse his soul.
Honestly, as soon as you whisper “Dele” into the ear of a girl, she’s putty in your hands.
A refined gent quaffing whiskey sours with one hand, stroking his beard and straightening his velvet blazer. Oh Dominic, you are so smooth. Dominic will take care of you, treat you right and still fuck you really hard.
He probably wants to spend the rest of his days living in an ecologically sustainable treehouse or whittling surfboards on the beach in Bali, and you’re surprisingly OK with that.
Remember Ed, Edd and Eddy? Not classically attractive characters, sure, but their names were getting at the versatility of good old “Ed.”
The ideal is an Edward in the streets and an Edmund in the sheets – just steer clear of Edgars, they’re bad news.
He wears a polo neck and drinks flat whites and reads. He reads. In 2016.
Fabian has an interesting ancestry – half Irish half Australian, or something. You stopped listening.
There’s something Peter Pan-like about the name Finn, as if every Finn is a slight, elfen man who can dance around in tights in a forest enclosure and still look damn good doing it.
Finn probably wears skinny jeans and smokes rollies. We like Finn.
When we asked you what the most attractive name in the world was last year, Freddie won with flying colours. Can he do it again?
Like the archangel, Gabriels are sent from heaven to please the eyes of ladies everywhere.
He’s probably got big, rough hands and he’s probably broken his nose a couple of times, but God loves Gavin’s imperfections and so do you.
A kingly name for the king of all names. Harrison. Erm, Orwell? Bush? There are loads of really fit Georges, we swear.
A prince’s name, and a pauper’s name. You just never know what you’re going to with Harry. He’s a nice guy, you always want him at parties and can introduce him to anyone. But he’s also a fully certified nutter with a penchant for narcotics and a dangerously infectious laugh.
A heath is a shrubland habitat characterised by open, low-growing woody vegetation and, like its namesake, Heath is a gentle, pure name which rolls off the tongue.
What do you picture when you picture a Heath? Simple: Heath Ledger’s angelic smile, or Heathcliff bracing the biting winds on the moors. Both are deeply satisfying, like the name itself.
More of a sound than a name, take away the H and it’s just “ugh”.
Yes, it’s posh beyond caricature, but that’s the appeal of Hugo – you know what you’re going to get. Namely, spontaneous helicopter trips and weekends away at his “other house.”
Apples fall on his head, and he still looks fly as fuck.
Jake’s a bit rough round the edges. He did drugs before you, lost his virginity before you, drank alcohol before you, drove his mum’s car without a license, probably got suspended from school before you – but there is something about Jake.
Maybe it’s the piercing blue eyes, maybe it’s the tattoos, maybe it’s the thought that you could repair this fragile young stud of a man, but you want him.
Every friendship circle requires a member called James. You’re paramount to the group dynamic and are probably just a really nice guy.
A playful little man-boy who’ll buy you sweets and want to spend his time with you getting drunk building a pillow fort. Yes, we’re thinking about Jamie Laing.
Disregarding the one from the Inbetweeners, have you ever met a real-life Jay who isn’t cool as shit? Yeah, we thought not.
Derived from the French “Germain,” which means “courageous,” “honest,” “determined,” “original” and “creative.” He may also be a bit of a show-off.
It’s easy to dismiss Joe as banal – we spend our time referring to people as “Average Joes,” but who wouldn’t want to be like the average Joe? Just because he’s got nicely-coiffed hair and an impressive taste in flannel shirts doesn’t mean there’s anything boring about him.
He’s artsy and probably plays the double bass. Joel is heavily involved in musical theatre, and will happily make sweet love to you in the greenroom.
He’s got a dark, twisted sense of humour and a cynical outlook on life to go with it. You just want to ruffle his hair and tell him not to be so miserable. Then you want to shag him.
There’s something comfortably exotic about a Josh. It’s the sort of name that could be as easily given to surf bro from Bondi beach or a aspiring screenwriter living in Beverly Hills. They were raised well, they’re naturally charming without being creepy.
You don’t see it coming, but when you fall for a Josh, you fall hard.
Probably North European, probably tall, probably good with his hands.
The name Kyle is derived from the Scottish word for strait, so beware – because you know that bad boys called Kyle are coming “strait” for you.
A real tasty treat of a name, and not just because he shares it with a delicious lunch establishment. Leon knows how to dress, where to dance, and how to sweep you off your feet. If you’ve dated a Leon, no-one after is ever going to match up.
“Yeah, Lewis, with a W. No, sorry not the French kind. Yeah I guess I am pretty boring. Yeah, Geography, in my second year. It’s my first time here, normally at home on the weekends with my girlfriend. Well, we split up last year, but we like to keep in touch. Hey, where are you going?”
He whines a bit too much, and has a bit of a sappy face. He’s a mummy’s boy from Surrey, he leaves his washing up too long, and doesn’t know how to operate a hoover. But, you’ve been with him since you were 16 so don’t go changing that now.
He sounds like a French king, and he acts like one too. As in, he’s weak and needy and you’d be shagging someone else if he didn’t always buy you macarons.
A solid Christian name, for a solid English gent. One of the boys and always up for a laugh, you’ll have to contend with the weekend accumulators and Jeff Stelling to get to this guy’s heart.
The exotic, free-and-easy version of Mark, what he lacks in a “K” he makes up for in spontaneous dates and congenially curly hair.
The serious, manly version of Marc, what he lacks in a “C” he makes up for in well-planned dinner dates and a seriously sturdy jaw.
Derived from the Hebrew meaning “gift from God,” which kind of sums up how people view his razor sharp wit and honest good looks.
Can be a source of confusion when abbreviated to “Matt” as Americans think you’re saying “mad”, like you’re angry at them. No, I’m not mad, I just want to sleep with you.
Max is a name that screams power, wealth, old money. “Maximilian will see you now,” “Maximilian, please stop spending your trust fund on cocaine.” Max is the real life version of Christian Grey.
If it wasn’t the world’s most attractive name, then why would it be the world’s most popular?
Resilient on its own, it becomes even better when shortened to “Mo,” which conjures up images of Mo Farah’s toothy, welcoming smile as he tries to flog you Quorn.
If he spells it “Ollie” or even “Olly,” he’s probably a muscular stud with a good head of flaxen hair and a rig like a granite counter. If he spells it “Oli,” he most likely breeds lizards and you should probably stay away from him.
You’ll never meet a boring Oscar. He’s charming, has a cheeky smile and can pull off winking.
He’s got a Welsh air about him, but not in the Bryn-Gavin-Gareth way of being all brusque and burly and a little bit bashed about from too much rugby.
No, Owen is the thinking Welshman – eloquent, level-headed and with a voice as soft as Trefriw wool.
He’s destined for a 9-5 grad scheme and he is going to get it, whatever the weather. Determined to be boring by day, he gets loose as fuck at night.
His friends from home call him Paddy, but he’ll have lost touch with them by third year and he’s got his grad scheme sorted at Unilever.
Rob’s just the most likeable guy around, isn’t he? Ever-affable, whether he’s shooting the shit with his mates in the pub or taking you out for an impromptu Nando’s, what you see with Rob is what you get – and you wouldn’t want anything more.
Rory can open a stiff jar lid, or change a flat tyre, or start a fire with nothing more than twigs. Stick with Rory.
He’s either a promoter, or a photographer, or an illustrator, or something creative. Bet he has a tattoo, and bet it’s not even a shit one.
You’re picturing Scotty T, aren’t you? God help us all.
If Harry Potter was good looking, he’d look like Sebastian. A vintage bicycle, leather satchel, striped scarf, slightly demure gaze behind those round glasses and scruffy pushed back hair. His room is littered with books, he’s a vegetarian, he’s got four dogs and likes walking them to the boutique artisan market on Sundays. A real take him home to your mum kinda guy – until he comes out that is.
He can bolt a pint of lager in sub-three seconds, and he’s got a classic signature dance move to boot.
You can’t really go wrong with Simon, even if you do hate the way his mates call him “Simmo.” He’s the kind of guy you’d bring home to your mum: he’ll buy her some flowers, and she’ll love him for it. Little does she know, he has a very naughty side.
Steve, Stevie, Stevo – he’s probably a fuckboy, but one you love to hate.
Bet he strokes his chin when he thinks seriously about things.
Oh, Tom. He’s got a really nice flat, he signs up to BorrowMyDoggy.com and he doesn’t always order the cheapest wine on the menu. Sure, the sex might be a bit vanilla, but it’s a small price to pay when he takes you for such pleasant weekend walks.
He might not sound like much, but who’s always there as a shoulder to cry on when Freddie or Sam or Luke does something dickish? Good old trustworthy Tim, that’s who.
Toby’s a DJ. Tobes has an earring cos he doesn’t give a fuck. Tobias wears a denim jacket and goes to club nights you didn’t even know existed. I’ll take all three.
There’s something very poetic about the name Tristan, as if he’s some sort of swashbuckling vagabond who’ll swing in on a rope and whisk you away with his beefy arms and floppy air. In reality he’s probably an anaemic-looking bloke who writes his own poetry, but this is 2016 so you can’t be picky.
Because if you say this guy wasn’t your first love, you’re only lying to yourself.
Do we need to say why?
CONTRIBUTORS: Bobby Palmer, Tom Jenkin, Daisy Bernard, Grace Vielma, Bella Eckert, Lucy Woodham, Kyle Farrell, Josh Kaplan, Harry Shukman, Eleni Mitzali and Matt McDonald
Other articles recommended by the author: