An ode to the George Foreman grill

How do I adore thee? Let me count the ways


People say the 90s brought us the internet, the spice girls, The Fresh Prince of Bel Air, but they often forget the real thing that changed our lives forever – the George Foreman grill.

The lean mean fat-reducing grilling machine, oh you are the light of my life. Each morning I awake to the sound of birds tweeting, the coffee machine buzzing, and old George, sat on my counter top, clicking away as he does when he’s warming up. The first slice of bacon kisses the grill with a sweet sizzle as it grills away beautifully, the aroma filling the kitchen. Oh, what a beautiful morning!

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My life wouldn’t be the same with George, my trusty grilling companion. Every day is like summer, an indoor barbecue no matter what the weather is. He’s saved my life on many occasion, be it coming home from a long day of lectures to serve me a toastie, or grilling my sausages for my hangover breakfast.

The namesake of a professional boxing champion, what’s not to love? You health freaks out there can grill whatever you like on it, safe in the knowledge it will be lean (and mean). You name it, you can grill it. Pineapple? Yes! Fish fingers? Yes! Paninis? Yes, yes, yes!! The versatility of this beautiful machine is but one of it’s many assets.

But, I hear you ask, why not just use the oven grill? Dear, oh dear, oh dear. Because, my darlings, that means cleaning the damned thing before your landlord turns up for your annual inspection! With the George Foreman, you simply wipe it clean with a damp cloth and store it away out of sight.

Lo, I call on you, my fellow human beings, to stop the snobbery surrounding the George Foreman. It’s too long been tarred as being a tacky piece of junk your Aunty Doreen got your dad from Argos, and this beautiful, life changing piece of machinery needs digging out of the cupboard, turning on, and having its needs fulfilled as a lean, mean grilling machine.

 

That’s right. Put your beef patties on that baby, get your sliced onions on it, get those pickles out of that jar and behold unto thee, a beautifully barbecued burger cooked by George himself.

It’s so good, he put his name on it.