The chaotic cast of MAFS UK 2022 as what meal deals they get before a commitment ceremony

I am sorry to report that the MAFS UK era shows now signs of slowing down, and that silly little show and the chaotic cast that made up the 2022 year of Married at First Sight still dominate my mind rent-free. There were a lot of contrasting characters this season – which is why the drama was the most explosive in the history of the show and why they inevitably smashed ratings left, right and centre. When you’ve got characters as big as the MAFS UK lot there’s only one thing for it – to think long and hard about what meal deals they get from Tesco. End of.

Chanita

Starting off with the ol’ dependable of meal deals, perfect for Chanita who is a nice and unproblematic girl with a nice and unproblematic meal deal. A bit basic yes, but no horrors to be found. A classical scran.

Jordan

This man has the tastebuds of an eight year old lad who just tramped mud all over his mum’s carpet after playing out.

April

The kind of boujie meal deal that, whilst you might emerge with a lot of value for money, you emerge comletely and utterly unfulfilled. There is not a crumb of fun to be found here, but at least the San Pelly is a chic touch.

George

The only people who eat ploughman’s sandwiches are men who put pictures on Instagram of them wearing Barbour coats and wellies, aka George, or my dead nan. Throw in a vile little meat stick and a coffee to ruin his breath for good measure and you’ve got the financial advisor lunch break recipe for evil.

Jenna

The vegan world get the short end of the meal deal stick with what the supermarkets offer them, so catch Zoe trying to make the best of it with a pesto and veg wrap and some fancy crisps. A bit of acid reflux from the Troppy but you’ve got to seek your thrills somewhere.

Zoe

This is what the diet of what someone who, in the year of 2022, is shocked that vegans can’t eat eggs looks like. This would turn to molten lava in your stomach I fear.

Johnathan 

This is the food that men who tell women to not get “horse legs” eat. Mayo-ridden pasta and wotsit dust all over your fingers.

Sophie

Look at the health! The boujieness! The boring snack! I’m asleep looking at this, sorry Sophie.

Matt

Have you ever seen a man with more triple all day breakfast energy than Matt Murray? No. Just imagine him in your staff room chomping on a boiled egg for a second. Just really think on that.

Whitney

This woman has never touched a meal deal in her life. She would eye roll you to hell if you so much as suggested it.

For more MAFS UK meal deals nonsense and all the latest Married at First Sight UK memes, tweets, gossip and quizzes, like The Holy Church of Love Island on Facebook.

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