Martin Bashir Celebrity X Factor

Erm, Martin Bashir was on The X Factor: Celebrity in 2019 and it’s an absolute fever dream

He crooned out some dad tunes alongside Wes Nelson and Megan McKenna

Excuse me, everyone, but why is the only person who remembers that disgraced journalist behind the Princess Diana Panorama Martin Bashir was a contestant on the short-lived Celebrity X Factor in 2019? I tried really hard to watch season five of The Crown utterly distracted every time Bashir popped up thinking… I watched you forget the words to Easy on a live show. Well, not the actor playing him – but you get me drift. Here’s all you need to know about the fever dream that was Martin Bashir starring on Celebrity X Factor.

‘I would love the opportunity to develop a second career’

Martin Bashir strolls onto Celebrity X Factor proclaiming he’s after a new career, and judges Simon Cowell, Nicole Scherzinger and Louis Walsh all give their best GCSE drama shocked faces – like they haven’t full well known the lineup this entire time. He gets on stage, sings a Benidorm karaoke rendition of Love by Marvin Gaye and swings his way through to the next round.

Martin then does a few live shows, and it’s all a bit like when we saw Wagner play cursed bongos to She Bangs. On week two he forgets his lyrics, but still manages to get through to week three. He only sings songs that you might find on a Michael Bublé album. Nicole Scherzinger fawns at every opportunity.

He got booted out on week three, and you know what? Three weeks was generous!

When and what was The X Factor: Celebrity???

I feel like it totally slipped the world by and then Covid hit and its memory was truly lost to the ether, but it was a slapdash celeb version of the show before it got cancelled. Megan McKenna won it, there was a group of Islanders featuring Wes Nelson, Zara McDermott, Eyal and Samira called No Love Lost and Artie from Glee sang Camila Cabello.

A weird time for the culture.

The Crown season five is available on Netflix now. For all the latest Netflix news, drops, quizzes and memes like The Holy Church of Netflix on Facebook. 

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