Just a list of all the things you can do from today apart from go back to uni

Unis won’t be going back until May 17th at the earliest


A whole load of lockdown restrictions have been lifted today and I for one, am absolutely gassed. Finally, after what feels like years, I can queue for an hour to sit in a beer garden with five friends in the freezing cold with an actual pint from an actual tap. It’s the stuff of dreams.

But what would make that long-awaited first sip taste so much sweeter is if students could come back to campus.

Ministers have today revealed that universities won’t be returning until May 17th, prompting Steve West, UWE’s Vice Chancellor, to tweet: “The reality is students have been pushed aside to open pubs.”

As much as I love the pub, Steve’s absolutely spot on. Here are just some of the things you can do today apart from return to university campuses.

Take a woodland break at Center Parcs

From today, you can go to self-catered accommodation like campsites, Airbnbs and yes, Center Parcs.

Basically you can go on holiday anywhere where you don’t share indoor facilities with other people from outside your household.

Go to the zoo

Do you really need your biology labs if you can go and see real animals up close and personal? I don’t think so.

Get rid of your mullet

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@mulletsofedi

That’s right, there are no more excuses. It’s time to wave goodbye to the mullet. Hairdressers, barbers and nail salons are all back, meaning you can get a skin fade and maybe some acrylics to go with it.

Go hunting for garms in charity shops

All non-essential retail is opening up meaning that you can peruse charity shops to your hearts content. If I were you, I’d get a big coat for the beer garden.

Get married

Nightclubs aren’t open so you’re probably still not going to pull for while. Sounds like monogamy is calling, but don’t worry as you can now get married and invite 15 whole friends along to the wedding.

Pump iron

You can’t go to lectures but you can be the hundredth person that day to use the same treadmill in the gym. Makes sense.

Beer gardens

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Get me in the beer garden, now!

You can of course go to a beer garden. This time there’s none of that substantial meal rubbish and no 10pm curfew.

Unfortunately, by the time you’ve read this, all the pubs are probably already booked up until June. Back to tinnies in the park for you.

Related articles recommended by this writer:

• Universities won’t be returning until at least 17th May, ministers have said

• The 20 Manchester outdoor bars and beer gardens you need to visit from 12th April

• Don’t feel pressure to go to the gym just because they’re reopening today