Gordon Ramsay’s got a new promoter haircut and yes chef, I would
Is it just me or is it hot in this kitchen
I'm sorry, but have you taken a look at Gordon Ramsay lately? Because he's looking fine. This week he got his hair cut into what I can only describe as a combination of an Iced Gem and a fade. And I am here to show you that he has in fact, transformed into a hot saucy snack.
At first, it was difficult to explain this inexplicable attraction fired up in all of us. But with this new hair style, it has become clearer. He's looking more and more like a 30- something club promoter. And anyone who says they don't fancy talentless promoters, is obviously wrong.
Look at his face and imagine it. He's slipping a flyer through your door, he's giving you £1 entry as he looks longingly into your eyes. If you don't believe me see his steamy new transformation below:
Here he looks like his son's older mate, who just wants to make a bit of cash. His hair looks a bit like a pineapple here. But it's fine, cos if he was a fruit, he'd be a fine-apple.
Nothing to see here, just Gordon Ramsay trying to tempt you with exclusive chicken burgers for you and three of your mates, with free chips at the entrance.
Or in this picture, in which he looks like he's about to promise you table with a free bottle of Grey Goose, but you know deep down he's gonna try and make you pay for it on the night.
Seriously what is going on here. And why does he look like he's about to refuse me a stamp at the door?
And in this photo, he's offering everyone £1 entry before 11.
He's even wearing that hooded jacket they all wear, when telling you lies about the number of queue jumps they have.
If you're not convinced he's slowly morphing into a promoter fuckboy, then what is this sultry thirst-trap he posted on his "gordongram"??
He looks like the guy who'll turn up on your doorstep at the worst time possible and only give attention to your fit flatmates.
Imagine it, he just added you on Facebook and tried selling you a fake fresher wristband even though you're not a fresher.
And, you know what? It's a good look. Wouldn't we all want to fall into one of his promoting traps?