You can now name a cockroach after your awful ex because you know what Tom you deserve it

Can I step on the cockroach and crush it to death after I name it or?

Happy Valentines Day! Well, Happy Soon-To-Be Valentine’s Day! How would you like to celebrate? With flowers from a petrol station, chocolates and a cheesy dinner with someone you don’t like? Or would you like to celebrate by naming a cockroach after your piece of shit ex? Well boy do I have a treat for you!

At New York City’s Bronx Zoo the “Name a Roach” program has been helping people gain peace of mind since Valentine’s Day all the way back in 2011. For just $10 you can give one of their Madagascar hissing cockroaches a name they deserve, and they’ll even send you a digital certificate to remember your iconic decision forever.

The zoo’s website says: “The countdown is on. Valentine’s Day is approaching and you don’t want to start the year on the wrong foot. Never fear, we’ve got the perfect gift. Name a Roach is back and it’s the best way to let your loved ones, or not-so-loved ones, know how you feel this holiday.

“If you’ve stopped swiping right and found your special someone, give him/her a gift that’s really eternal: name a Bronx Zoo Madagascar hissing cockroach in his/her honor. For $10, we’ll send a digital certificate with the roach’s name for your loved one to cherish for years to come.”

If you want to go really over the top you can add chocolates and a plush cockroach toy to your gift for $35 or $50. Treat yourself.