Crikey, the best clubbers in the UK this week aren’t holding back

Do they kiss their mothers with those mouths?


What’s that coming over the hill? It’s not an outdated reference, it’s the Clubbers of the Week!

Yes, we’re back with yet another edition of your favourite Sunday afternoon read. Try not to enjoy it too much, you lazy old lot.

It’s DJ Brexit on the decks

dj-brexit-on-the-decks

This track’s called ‘If I Could Turn Back Time’

And if you’re looking for wankers, here’s

if-youre-looking-for-wankers-heres

Get it?

Uh, hello, God? I need to report an accident!

id-like-to-report-an-accident

Looks like three of your angels have fallen from heaven!

Bonus MIC lookalike: Lucy Watson’s having fun

mic-lucy-watson

She’s definitely been talking about you behind your back

Most crudely Photoshopped-on hat

most-crudely-photoshopped-hat

You’re not fooling anyone

Least fair dance-off

most-one-sided-dance-off

Well it’s just obvious who’s going to win, isn’t it?

Bonus MIC lookalike: These girls think they’ve met Proudlock

that-face-you-pull-when-you-think-youve-met-proudlock

Spoiler alert: They haven’t

When you tell your mum you’re not going clubbing

when-you-tell-your-mum-youre-not-out-clubbing

Hope she doesn’t recognise our hoodies

When you won’t let your singing career disrupt your Bumble game

when-you-wont-let-your-singing-career-get-in-the-way-of-your-bumble-game

Lol is that ur dog in the 2nd pic? so cute

You brought a whole wheel of cheese?

you-brought-a-whole-wheel-of-cheese

Yes, that was an Anchorman reference

When you forget what your costume is halfway through the night

you-cant-remember-what-your-costume-was-meant-to-be

Erm… Angry Birds?

Guess who’s not having a good night?

guess-which-one-was-forced-to-do-this

Oh, him

guess-yeah-it-was-this-one