Right, here’s why the guy who ghosted you is always the first to watch your Instagram story

There are certain things in life which are undeniably frustrating: getting your sleeve caught on a door handle when you’re already in a bad mood. Walking upstairs then immediately forgetting what you went there for. But nothing is as infuriating as when a guy who’s decided to air your messages continues to watch and like all of your social media content. Like, what do these people want? To lurk until the end of time?

The answer, quite simply, is yes. These men are never not watching. And it turns out there’s a reason behind why people who ghost you are always the first to watch and interact with your Instagram stories. Surprise, surprise, it’s much more about them than it is about you:

Okay, so why do guys who ghost you lurk on your social media until the end of time?

Obviously, it’s totally and utterly baffling when people who you’ve been dating stop replying but still watch your every move online. Surely, you’d imagine, if they don’t want anything to do with you, then that includes on social media as well. But this isn’t always the case, especially not for commitment-phobes.

“Here’s what’s actually going on,” levels Hayley Quinn, dating expert at Match. ‘When this guy first met you, he was attracted to you, and it was this attraction that motivated him to ask you out on your first date. However, even if he came on really strong, that doesn’t necessarily mean he’d made a decision about the future of the relationship with you – he was just living in the moment.

“A few dates later, his true dating intentions began to show. Instead of setting up dates with you consistently, he started acting flaky. This isn’t because he’s any less attracted to you, it’s because he’s not currently looking for a committed relationship, and this is the best he currently has to offer. Added to this he’s also becoming aware that you now like him, and realising he can’t deliver on the first impression he made, he’s disappeared.

“Despite this, he’s still attracted to you, and he may want to still (quite literally) view you as an option, which is likely why he’s checking your social media. However, until he makes a consistent effort to set up dates in real life, protect your time and resist checking his stories in return, and put him on your mental back burner.”

So, there’s your answer. Now, block him and run for the hills x

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