If you do seven out of these 12 things, you’re officially a posh Exeter student

If you’re an Exeter girly, here’s your ultimate guide to upgrading to the posh Exeter girly.

Score seven out of 12, and congratulations – you’re posh for sure. But hit 12 out of 12? Girl, that’s not just posh, that’s generational wealth and a trust fund kind of vibe.

1. Frequenting Pret on campus

Look, I’m also partial to a cheeky Pret. Usually the Pret on Russell Square this is my go-to when I stay overnight in London. I’m also likely to grab a hot chocolate from the Pret at Waterloo, too. But for us working-class and lower-middle folk, Pret is a real treat. Getting a Pret on your way to class is next level posh.

2. Shopping at Urban Outfitters

Honestly, I don’t really understand the appeal. The clothes look fragile, like they might fall apart, yet they come with a spenny price tag. But I guess that’s the point, isn’t it? To give the impression that you spent your afternoons hunting through thrift stores and vintage shops, while secretly dropping a small fortune at Urban as a shortcut.

3. Wearing Ralph Lauren to a random seminar at 3:30pm on a Wednesday

I’d argue most Exeter girlies have one or two pieces lying around, but wearing Ralph Lauren to a seminar just-because seems a bit next-level posh. Bonus points if it’s A) an American flag jumper or B) paired with a string of pearls.

4. Taking the Exeter St Davids to London Paddington train

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I am prone to taking the train from Exeter St Davids to London Waterloo. The trains are a tad rank, they take a lifetime to get to your destination, and they use the South West Mainline which is genuinely the bane of my existence

This line is the only one that runs through the small town my folks now live in. Sure, it connects me to my native London and my life at Exeter, but it’s genuinely the reason I now drive. If you can afford the Exeter to Paddington route, I envy you (and hate you a little bit too).

5. You work for spending money

If you work for a TP-fund, for weekend shopping sprees, or maybe even because Daddy says he’ll cut you off if you don’t develop a “work ethic”… yeah, that’s posh. Some of us work for fuel money, bills, or to afford Christmas presents for loved ones.

6. Drive something by Land Rover (or, if you’re really feeling posh, a Range Rove-ah)

Okay, guilty. My first car is a Land Rover Freelander two. Her name’s Doris, she has heated seats, and I love her, but she is absolute chaos.

In six months, Doris has broken down over 15 times. No, I’m not kidding. Her driver’s window sticks, doors only lock with a key, rear door jammed, turbo sticks, lights flicker over speed bumps, and she’s held together with duct tape and prayers. She shudders, can’t go over 40 MPH, and I have to manually override the gears just to limp her along the A303.

Lucky for me, I have a diagnostic device. Plug it in, read the eight error codes (superturbo overcharge, my arse), erase them, and voila – warnings gone.

She’s my uni commuter, my Domino’s delivery car, and honestly old enough to be a fresher herself. Her cupholders do a mean job holding a Starbucks Grande, too.

If your Land Rover or Range Rover isn’t 60 per cent duct tape and under 10 years old, congrats, you’re living the dream.

7. You go out with the hunt (or at least, support it)

I’m not here to get involved in the recent debate – welfare of wildlife, hounds, and horses aside – the hunt is a marker of class. I’ve ridden on a couple of hunt yards (and my horse is an ex-hunter) and I can tell you, while these riders claim that they’re working class, they all have Aga in the kitchen and a Range Rove-ah out front. And if you follow the hunt (while cosplaying as a farmer in tweed and Le Chameau boots) yeah, that’s proper posh.

8. You have the full Apple ecosystem

I’m talking a Mac, iPad, iPhone, Apple Pen, and Apple Watch. Proper unnecessary, proper bougie.

9. Starbucks, anyone?

Bonus points if it’s the one on campus.

10. Popping home for mummy to do the laundry

If you go home once or twice a month for laundry day, I envy you. Us poor folks have to struggle with circuit laundry, move home entirely, or use mouldy washing machines in our student houses. Yuck.

11. You have Spotify premium

Even if you’re leaching off of your parents’ family account, it’s still really posh. You don’t have to listen to nonsense adverts that ruin the vibe? You can cue songs? Ugh, get out of here.

12. University is an excuse to find a boyfriend, go out clubbing, and not work for three plus years

Seriously, I know some of you lot only came to “Exetah” for the student life, excuse to binge drink, and become nocturnal. Ah, the life.

Bonus points if you’re the very special type who fails a year just for the repeat. “Daddy will pay for an extra year”, you tell yourself, and “I don’t have to work for a whole extra year”. The envy I feel.

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