A guide to graduating in Bristol: Do’s and don’ts for the big day

It’s the end of June, and for all UoB and UWE final years, we’re T-minus two weeks (ish) to that one day that interrupts a glorious summer of panicking about what to do next – graduation day. If you’re one of the lucky few who has already booked a one-way ticket abroad with no time on your schedule for graduation, I salute you and advise you to skip this article. For the rest of us mere mortals, here are some “do’s and don’ts”, to have the best day possible and avoid being the butt of all family jokes forever.

DO: Tell the uni how to say your name properly on your graduation registration form

This one’s a “hopefully you’ve already done this”, but there’s absolutely nothing worse than finally completing a course that had you debating the merits of dropping out to start a career as a Depop seller whilst sitting in the ASS or Frenchay Library three Red Bulls deep at 2am, only for you to get on stage and have the announcer say your name wrong. I assume, anyway. My name is as boring as it gets.

DON’T: Sneak plus ones into the hall

I have a feeling the stewards might notice if you attempt to sneak your aunts, uncles, cousins, and their cousin’s daughters (and the dog) into the hall on your two ticket allocation. But maybe if you put the dog in a handbag…? (this is a joke please do not bring dogs in handbags into graduation).

DO: Bring safety pins if you are a woman or wearing a dress

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Is this… a useful tip? It just might be! Because graduation gowns were originally designed to be worn only by men (of course), the stoles (the coloured bit that goes across the chest) sit very nicely on a button-down shirt, whilst they ride up on a dress and end up acting as a choker. Bringing safety pins allows you to affix the stole to your clothing and removes the possibility of an outfit mishap.

DON’T: Get smashed before the ceremony

For those with a 9am ceremony, you’re probably fine, although I’d skip the mimosas. For those with a 4pm ceremony, when you have the whole day to celebrate? Walking in a straight line is kind of important when crossing the stage, otherwise your graduation walk may turn into an impromptu stage dive like you’re at a Rage Against the Machine concert, so maybe wait until after the ceremony for the drinking to commence in full.

DO: Get there early and take photos

That scene from The Amazing Spider-Man 2 where Andrew Garfield’s Peter Parker is late to graduation because he’s fighting crime and runs on stage in the nick of time with his rucksack on, and then snogs Gwen Stacy? Pretty cool in theory, but I’d try and avoid it by getting to graduation early enough to take a thousand photos and still have plenty of time to make it for the practice. Maybe 2,000 photos.

DON’T: Let your family bring in noisemakers

It will feel amazing when your family or friends cheer for you after your name is called. This is not possible if they get kicked out of the ceremony for bringing in whistles, megaphones, vuvuzelas, or those plastic blow-up things you smack together at cricket matches.

DO: Feel proud of surviving uni

Don’t let anyone forget that this is your day. It’s you who has suffered through the late night assignments, the group projects where there was always one person not pulling their weight, the tutorials, the labs, and the hours of fixing code that wouldn’t work when it was just missing an end bracket. Take pride in your achievements and those of your peers, and enjoy this day.

DON’T: Dap up the faculty staff unless prior agreed/do a flip on stage

Don’t do it. You will not go viral, I promise.

Made it to the end? Congratulations!

I hope you take in all these tips, and that they lead to a smooth, fun, and satisfying graduation that, five years later when you see your graduation photo on the mantelpiece, will only bring back fond memories.

For actual graduation advice please visit UoB or UWE’s graduation web pages.