A very serious ranking of the Love Island 2025 cast by how much chaos I reckon they’ll cause

Well gals, the cast for Love Island 2025 has officially been announced. I’m so excited. Now we’ve all had time to digest this information, here’s a very serious ranking of all the Love Island 2025 cast by how much drama I reckon they’ll bring to the villa.

My sources of information were their Instagrams, the cast announcements, but mostly just vibes and my own very judgemental opinions. Enjoy.

12. Kyle

Um, what can I do with this?

Kyle has zero Instagram posts. This is so deeply unhelpful. Based on this, I can only assume he is a complete personality vacuum and will make precisely zero waves in the villa. For the love of God, post some pics of a cute dog or a fun holiday or literally anything whatsoever.

11. Dejon

He’s actually a nepo baby – his dad Gifton Noel-Williams is a moderately famous football player. Maybe Dejon will follow in the footsteps of all other nepo baby Islanders, and get lots of screen time yet have no personality.

10. Sophie

Following a fire breathing accident, Sophie became a motivational speaker and author. Maybe she’s too eloquent and skilled at communication to shout nonsense at people and storm off in the way Love Islanders often do.

9. Meg

(Image via Instagram)

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She seems to be a girls’ girl – Her Instagram is full of pics of her on glamorous holidays with a giant group of female friends. So maybe Megan will spend less time backstabbing the other girls, and more time maximising her free holiday? Or maybe I’m grasping at straws because basically everyone who goes on this show has identical wannabe influencer vibes and I need to make my judgements based off something?

8. Alima

She just looks too smiley and nice to ever scream at someone. But maybe I’ll be proven wrong when we reach the dramatic Casa Amor era.

7. Tommy

(Credit: ITV)

He’s only 22. Generally on Love Island, the younger contestants are a bit lacking in the relationship experience and emotional maturity required to smoothly navigate messy situations (to put it mildly). However, he is a landscape gardener, and who’s ever met an interesting landscape gardener? So I’m putting him firmly in the middle of this ranking.

6. Harry

He has, like, a gazillion different jobs. He’s a footballer and a model and a gold trader and a body double for Declan Rice? If Harry multitasks in his professional life, maybe he’ll have lots of girls on the go at once too.

5. Helena

Helena says she fancies people who are funny and have big personalities. “You can pretty much laugh me into bed.” She’s also allergic to southerners, and said: “Northern people have much more banter than southerners.” If she’s all about the chat, maybe she’ll be pretty outspoken herself. We love to see it.

4. Ben

This 23-year-old taxi driver says he wants someone “someone sexy, good looking, good chat, good vibes, nice teeth and good eye contact – they’re all the traits I look for. Oh, and also a cute smile, I just look at you and know I can be around you all day, every day.”

Er, correct me i I’m wrong, but didn’t he just say he likes women who look nice in six different ways? The quantity of shirtless pics on his Instagram doesn’t exactly give “humble”. Red flags.

3. Blu

Um, his name is blu and that’s just an instant red (or blu?) flag. No offence.

2. Shakira

Well, her name is Shakira. She’s not going to be boring, is she? Shakira already has 59,000 followers on Instagram and no less than eight brands linked to her bio. I’m sensing she’s in it to win it (and land those fast fashion deals).

1. Megan

I mean, she’s a literal drama queen. She graduated from The Brighton Academy and in summer 2024 and has since been in a Cinderella pantomime in Tekesbury. Her TikTok account has 20k, and is filled with lil skits (some of which are actually funny). I expect lots of snark and drama from Megan, please. She tops my ranking of which Love Island 2025 cast members I reckon will bring the most chaos to the villa.

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