Psychologist breaks down Madison’s avoidant attachment on Love Is Blind – now it all makes sense

During season eight of Love Is Blind, Madison Errichiello became one of the more controversial contestants for being completely candid about her mental health, previous relationships, and the avoidant attachment style she claims.

During the pods segment, Madison’s love interest Alex Brown admitted to having an anxious attachment style which is associated with somewhat clingy behaviour, being highly sensitive to criticism, and feeling unworthy of love. Madison soon shared her own attachment style, with people online wrongly claiming she was trauma dumping despite the conversation literally being about mental health.

Nonetheless, the avoidant attachment style is somewhat controversial. As a term predominantly used to describe traits and characteristics of childhood, some have argued that it can’t be relevant to an adult. But that just isn’t the case, according to a psychologist.

What is the ‘avoidant attachment’ style Madison talks about in Love Is Blind?

Speaking to The Tab, Dr Leslie Sanders explained that avoidant attachment stems from a “childhood condition” where there was constant neglect or minimisation of a child’s emotional needs, something Madison often spoke about in the pods.

“This may cause the child to turn to self-sufficiency as a method of self-protecting from the hurt that comes with unfulfilled emotional needs. Gradually, this defensive mechanism becomes a way of life, determining how they relate with others and handle their feelings in older age,” she added.

What does the ‘avoidant attachment’ style mean in adult relationships?

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As we saw in the earlier episodes, when Alex and Madison were discussing their attachment styles, avoidance is a tough topic to broach. People on Reddit have been debating it for weeks, with some arguing that it’s unhealthy to harp on childhood traumas and others applauding the couple for their openness and honesty.

Dr Leslie Sanders told us that the avoidant attachment style can affect adult relationships.

“The pattern of behaviour is often a repeat of past events; for instance, avoiding emotional intimacy or valuing independence in a relationship too much. Be that as it may, recognizing the patterns gives a chance for healthy development and more constructive relationship behaviour,” she said.

That difficulty in connecting with people can create “relational barriers marked by emotional disconnection” that in turn spark miscommunication. Again, this was something Alex feared and Madison addressed in the pods.

Obviously, she could not promise their arguments would always end in a hug but maintained that she would always do her best to communicate her feelings without withdrawing.

“Moreover, their reluctance to express feelings may prevent them from acceptably resolving issues,” the clinical psychologist added.

The term is inappropriately used quite often

Watching Alex and Madison is hella triggering when you’ve been in an anxious + avoidant relationship before…#LoveIsBlind8 #LoveIsBlind pic.twitter.com/Av1zyWobJy

— annmarie (@thisisannmarie) February 16, 2025

In the last few years, the world has FINALLY started to give mental health and past traumas the attention they deserve, and though there is still work to be done, light is finally being shed on what one out of every two people in the world suffer with.

But with greater attention comes the misuse of terms. We see it on TikTok with people claiming they have OCD when they like to tidy their rooms, or with people who adopt labels and terms without knowing the true meaning.

Cautioning people against adopting a label they don’t properly understand, Dr Leslie Sanders explained: “Though avoidant attachment is a genuine psychological concept, incorrectly applying it can reduce multifaceted emotional actions to an unreasonable degree.

“So much overuse of the term could lead to the tagging of a person devoid of comprehending the more profound psychological motives behind their behaviour. This poses the danger of justifying misguided behaviour without confronting the actual problems that cause it, which, in the end, impedes emotional development and more wholesome relationships.”

Featured image credit: Netflix

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