Oxford students threatened with £1,000 fine after student leaves ‘repulsive’ poo on floor

‘This behaviour goes beyond any bounds that could be considered reasonable’

2 years ago

Oxford University students have been threatened with a collective £1,000 fine after a student was alleged to have done a poo on the floor of a communal bathroom and left it for others to clean up.

The accommodation and facilities officer at University College, where the incident took place, wrote to students yesterday morning telling them “the repulsive behaviour” would not be tolerated and “goes beyond the bounds of what could be considered reasonable”.

Shane Pledge, added his cleaning staff would not be cleaning up the mess and they will refuse to do any cleaning in the entire building until “the culprit comes forward”.

Students were left with gloves and cleaning products and given hours to clean up the poo. If the student responsible didn’t come forward or it wasn’t cleaned by the end of the day, all the residents would share a £1,000 fine for an external cleaning company to come in and resolve poo-gate.

University College, founded in 1249, is one of Oxford’s oldest colleges and is home to 400 students. It is made up of a historic main site nestled in the heart of Oxford and a smaller site on Starverton Road in North Oxford.

Whilst the poo culprit remains unknown, we know it took place in the ground floor bathroom of Durham Building II, one of the adjoining buildings on the main site of University College, where all first year students are housed.

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In a toilet story that continues to grip the attention of some of our country’s smartest students, somebody has come forward as the alleged poo culprit. In an anonymous confession post, they said they had fatally attempted to “follow through on a fart”. You can read more here.

In a social media post last night, the College JCR president vowed to do “everything in my power to bring the perpetrator of this egregious crime to justice”.

“No stone will be left unturned,” they declared.

True to their word, in their initial “investigation”, they found the incident to be an “episode of uncontrolled and involuntary bowel movements”, adding: “The substance was, at one point, liquid.”

There was believed to be evidence of poo on the bathroom bench as well as the floor.

The highly forensic investigation concluded: “Judging by the direction of flow, the perpetrator ran out of the area while the episode was ongoing.

“I identified several examples of what are certainly human footsteps leading out of the area. Toe analysis shows that the perpetrator was barefoot when the crime occurred.”

University College has been approached for comment.

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