Freshers. Next year, you will realise how dumb you really sounded

This year the freshers page has seen its worst posts yet, as freshers lose all sight of initiative.

Among all the advertisement of societies, people selling old textbooks and the mundane fears of questioning whether to buy Platinum or Platinum Xtra, there have been a few weird requests and questions from some freshers.

This fresher has well and truly got into the spirit of uni already, having brought a beer helmet to uni and losing stuff on nights out. This is only the beginning my friend.

They’re not messing about, they’re going to trust someone in a place they haven’t even been to yet with permanently marking their skin.

Don’t worry USA Chicken were there for students just like they are at the end of every night out.

Sorry mate you’re the only person out of a uni of 16,000 students to be doing Publishing and English.

History and Geography combined honours on the other hand that is a lonely existence, trust me.

This fresher should also be advised that high stake gambling never works well on a student loan.

And what should you bring? As much stuff as will possibly fit in your room, which is not a lot at all. Unless you live in Elvyn, then you can bring enough to fill a second bedroom and a walk in wardrobe.

This next one is quite cute, no you will never need to show your GCSE certificates ever again. In fact, forget you ever did them and if someone ever asks you about them, make up what you like.

Forget about your A-Levels too, you’re at uni now so get drunk a lot and oh yeah get a degree.

Don’t worry some helpful second years were there to provide some guidance.

Echos is already becoming known to a few freshers.

Somehow I think the real experience won’t quite live up to the hype, or will it?