Gordon Pal
Clare, Maths Gordon was fired from the Blackpool Primark Cash Office for not being able to count, but has found his way to Cambridge and enjoys coaching and playing cricket in his spare time. "I like Gord. He's a much better pal than Ali", Tab Director and Gordon's elder brother, wrote 'Remix Ryan'. We are yet to see if it's true.

Zafar Za Good

First Year Geographer Zafar Ansari weighed in with 30 quick runs and four economical overs on his Twenty20 debut to help Surrey to a comfortable victory over Essex.

20 Questions for Ahir Shah

Casually taking a break from Campus, Skins, Footlights, stand-up and satire, Ahir Shah tells us about his favourite stand-up, being officially called a ‘lad’ by a London newspaper, and why none of the Cambridge comedians would be good company on a desert island.

Roll Out The Punting

Cambridge’s newest punt will be named after its Duke and Duchess to commemorate their marriage last week.

Fees For Fair Access

Uni bigwigs have agreed investments in access with the Office for Fair Access in an attempt justify trebling fees.

Christ’s New Fresto

Christ’s will reveal two new pieces of art by Tom de Freston for their altar in a special service on Easter Sunday.

Enemy of the State Schools

The University has again failed to reach its state school admissions target, despite investing ‘significant time and resources in outreach activity.’

To The Res-CUSU

Plans to slash bursaries given to Cambridge students have been shelved thanks to CUSU’s campaign.

Assange Avoids Leaks

Julian Assange insists on a media blackout on his talk today.

Bursaries Saved

The University announced this afternoon that it would be making a U-Turn on its plans to slash bursaries as part of budget cuts.

Money Survey: Part 2

You’ve met Mr and Miss Cambridge, now The Tab brings you Cambridge’s Rich Lists by College and subject…

Parmar Pulls Out

Julian Parmar has withdrawn as a candidate for the Union Presidency due to personal reasons, it was announced this morning.

Charlie Chalks Up Visit

Prince Charles will visit the University on Monday, it was announced today.

Watson His Mind?

Co-discoverer of DNA, Prof. James Watson, will face protests from students when he returns to Cambridge this week for his controversial views

Swimmers Sink Oxford

GORDON PAL sees Cambridge seal victory at the death in Varsity swimming.

Come Dine With Brit

Tab Totty Brit is out to whip the competition into shape on Come Dine With Me tonight.

Cuts Protesters Arrested

Police have made three arrests after protesters disrupted a Council meeting on budget cuts.

‘Billies Bake Final Buns

The cake shop praised by The Telegraph in 1995 for “its stickyissimus Chelsea bun” has shut, to be vandalised only days later.

Beggar Off!

Cambridge’s residents have been warned not to give money to the homeless by an ex-beggar.

Gilmour Charged For Cenotaph Stunt

Charlie Gilmour was arrested today, due to his involvement with last year’s protests.

Scott Dunn With Varsity

Holiday providers Scott Dunn have decided to withdraw sponsorship of the Ski Trip after hearing what students got up to.

Save Our Supervisions

A report has recommended that Cambridge cut down on one-on-one supervisions and scrap underachieving MPhils in a bid to improve efficiency.

Les Said About Occupation The Better For VC

The occupation was not entirely peaceful and caused £50,000 worth of damage, according to the Vice-Chancellor.

Charlie Gilmour Arrested For Cenotaph Stunt

UPDATE: Gilmour has been charged for violent disorder by police and is due in court on February 10.

Another Prick On A Wall

Girton historian Charlie Gilmour was photographed using a Union Flag to climb the Cenotaph during yesterday’s protests.

Released: Official Occupation Statement

The University’s statement on tuition fees is less clear than protesters had hoped.

It’s All Over!

After 11 days the occupation of the Old Schools’ Combination Room has come to an end. Find out what went on with The Tab’s full retrospective.

Andy Zaltzman at The Wolfson Howler

GORDON PAL asks of the best Wolfson Holwer yet, “More of the same next term, please.”

Not A Clegg To Stand On

Nick Clegg has cancelled his talk at the Oxford Union amid accusations that he is too “chicken” to answer students over his stance on tuition fees.

Cambridge Pandering to Chinese

Cambridge University Press has adopted a baby giant panda in China.