These unhinged flatmate stories from UK unis will make you want to drop out immediately

We asked UK uni students for their most unhinged flatmate stories, and you all really delivered. Reading the comments on the TikTok was such an emotional rollercoaster. Poisoning people with laundry detergent? Using the kitchen as your own personal bathroom? Hosting strange religious meetings at the dead of night? Read on at your own risk. Some of these UK uni flatmate stories might lead you to lose all faith in humanity and want to drop out of uni right now.

So, here are the most unhinged flatmate stories UK uni students had to offer us.

This seems to be strangely common

In my first year, one of my flatmates started putting bleach and laundry detergent in our food and drinks when we were in the flat.

I’m guessing she wasn’t studying food and nutrition

“The girl in the room next to me set fire to her bedroom twice by cooking seafood sticks in the plastic wrapper. I had to call the fire brigade TWICE.”

Sounds like a reasonable response

“She threatened to kill us / hex us all because she lost a rubber glove in the kitchen. Full written serial killer scrawl note, too.”

When the kitchen gets like this, ritualistic curses are the only solution

Enough said

“For ages our flat really stank of sewage, and then one day I found out that my flatmate has been sh*tting in a litter tray for for months because they had blocked their toilet with sanitary items.”

What in the Apple Cider Vinegar?

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“I lived with a compulsive liar, started out small but in third year she told us she had cancer. things weren’t adding up and she was being caught up in lies. We messaged her mum and said we were concerned. Her mum blocked us and after graduation she deleted all traces of us from her social media, blocked us all and started a new life in a different city. She now works in a hospital.”

I felt ill writing this out

“My old flatmate was on a carnivore diet and ate raw mince and egg like it was cereal. Came home once to him defrosting a lamb’s brain on the counter.”

Please tell me the sick just didn’t sit on the carpet for three weeks

“Threw her a birthday party in our flat, cleaned, decorated and paid for all the drink (I was a uni student so you can imagine how much it cost). She showed up three hours late, drunk with her work colleagues. They trashed the flat, broke my plants and shower door.

“She proceeded to vomit all over the carpet and tell me she doesn’t want to spend her birthday with me (and our two other friends) because her ‘new work friends’ were fun and there were more of them, so why would she want to spend time with us when there is more of them? She then didn’t clean up the sick for three weeks.”

Edward Cullen, is that you?

“I caught her in my bedroom in the corner watching me sleep at 5am, after my ex was telling me she was and I didn’t believe him.”

A nice surprise for pedestrians

“Poured old milk out of the window because he believed that it couldn’t go down the sink. We lived on the third floor.”

This is quite the alarm clock

“My flatmate in the room next to me has worship meetings in our kitchen every Thursday night where they just stand in the kitchen and sway to music and we’re not allowed in. He also plays incredibly loud sermons at 9am every day and it wakes me up.

“I checked our council elections and he’s not a part of the official Christian societies we have. So like, it is a cult?”

I thought TikTokers only did this as a joke…

“Filled the sink with boiling water and all my tea bags to make a ‘massive cup of tea’ and left it there for days while she continued to drink from it. I couldn’t use the sink until she was done.”

Scientists should study the microbiome that is uni kitchen sinks

I would be miffed I wasn’t picked to be a fictitious bridesmaid

“Currently living with a compulsive liar. She had this weird competition with me in first year. I was engaged to be married soon and she came back from a holiday and told us all that she got married. And then when me and my other flatmate called her out a month later she tried to gaslight us and said she never said that even though she made a huge deal of her being married the entire time.”

Why? Just why?

“The flat next door had someone who was p*ssing in the shared kettle.”

I would run out the halls and all the way home

“At uni I poured myself a bowl of (branded – because treat yourself) Shreddies to find dozens of cotton swabs with ear wax on them mixed into the bag. I was mortified and still have no idea who did it.”

…Bonus flatmates?

What uni household doesn’t contain 2+ uninvited lodgers?

“We have an international student from Turkey in our halls, and his family flew over from Turkey and started living in his room. Eventually they had to be escorted out by security.”

Clearly the wound is deep

“He a) set the microwave on fire because he got high and left rice cooking in it and b) drank my entire bottle of vodka then replaced it with water and refused to buy me another one (we lived above a 24/7 Tesco).”

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