Things you’ll only get if you have a weird name

There’s no greater bonding moment than when two people with weird surnames meet. No drunk girls in the bathroom of a club can even come close. Of course, there’s always an unspoken awareness of who has the worst of the weird surnames. (Cocking is clearly superior to Cocker, for example.)

Even so, if your parents saw fit to give you a messed up first name or even just passed down their dubious surname, you’re probably well versed in the downsides of your unique birthright. But what about the upsides?

Whether your (sur)name has some variation of the word ‘cock’ in it, lends itself to juvenile jokes, or is even just straight up spelled funny, you need to learn to appreciate it – it’s going to be with you for a while, whether you like it or not.

Here are the best reasons to embrace your weird (sur)name. Now go and thank your parents.

Mared Emlyn Parry, 19

Maybe your name isn’t English, meaning the indisputable perk is how much you stand out from the crowd. Mared Emlyn Parry knows this only too well, having an “exceptionally Welsh” name. Aside from the questionable nickname Madhead, she likes that you only have to mention her first name to know who’s been talked about: “there’s typically no need to introduce myself with my full name…Mared is enough, and I don’t know many people who can say that!”

Noor Behzad-Noori, 20

Noor Behzad-Noori instead likes the fact she can shorten her name to Noor Noori which she feels is “quite unique” and once even prompted a nurse to say “it sounds like she’s from Hollywood!” Understandably, even though she often has to introduce herself “in the most ridiculous way, eg. ‘my name is door with an N'”, she “wouldn’t ever change” her name as she likes “how unique/ rare it is.”

Natalie Probst, 22

German Natalie Probst claims the majority of people pronounce her surname Prost. Coincidentally, this is the German equivalent for ‘cheers’, but it’s something she embraces given that “if it helps people remember my name, it’s a positive for me.” Cheers to that.

Cemre Çubuk, 22

Plus, what better conversation starter than your own name? Cemre Çubuk (Jem-ray Chu-book) says that “having to explain where it’s from and what it is when you meet new people” is the biggest perk of having a weird (sur)name. Although Isabelle Richards, 22, notes that the best thing about Cemre’s name is being able to find “1000 variations of Cemre to annoy him with.”

Lauren Cocking, 21

Or, perhaps your name has some variation of rudeness lurking in it. Al least everyone always knows who you are! If you’re from a small village, everyone you meet will know at least one of your distant relatives. The fun really begins when someone name-drops a person you’ve never heard of though. Cue the realisation that there’s possibly another family out there stealing your name thunder. Or a secret cousin you’ve never met. Plus, you never have to worry about changing your name at the altar. Everyone knows changing your surname is so last season anyway, and nothing sounds good when it’s forced into holy double-barrelled matrimony with the surname Cocking, so the decision is easy. Cocking4eva.

Delaney Sexton, 19

Delaney says that “with the word sex in my name, of course I was picked on when I was younger. My favorite was when someone mentioned how your ancestors got their last names because of their profession…So what were my ancestors? Prostitutes? With tons of sex?”

Robin Joynson, 22

More often than not, your weird name is just weird because of the spelling, but Robin Joynson enjoys the “humorous misspellings/ mispronunciations at important life events.”

Erica Jordyn Spaeth, 21

While “people can’t pronounce Spaeth at all”, instead saying “‘Speeth’ or ‘Spa-eth’”, Erica finds it great that “people never confuse me with other people because nobody else has that last name except for one or two sports players.”  Plus, she even has the added bonus of maybe (but probably not) being related to American football player Steve Spaeth.

Chloe Peirce, 22

Even though Chloe’s surname sounds quite common, “it’s spelled weirdly” and people “often just change the spelling assuming I’ve made a mistake or they’ll ask if I’ve spelled my own name wrong”. At least with a weird name you do get really good at spelling, even if people always seem to assume that your name couldn’t possibly – in my case – have the word ‘cock’ in it. Like Chloe says, “I’m pretty sure after 22 years I’ve nailed spelling my own name.”

Stephanie Fiedler, 20

Although sometimes name spelling confusion can lead to your friends “forgetting your actual name”. This is exactly what happened to Stephanie ‘Fred’ Fiedler, when a misplaced ‘r’ at band camp turned her temporarily into Stephanie Fredler.

Josh Zatorski, 22

“Being able to find your name on any list” is Josh Zatorski’s personal perk of having a weird name. Why bother listening for your name or hunting through a sea of Davies’ and Thomas’ when you know your surname will fall smack bang at the end of the list? If anything, it’s a time saver.

Rachel Beaney, 22

Maybe your weird name is actually just a bit funny, like Rachel “‘I’m a bean” Beaney, who admittedly gets some great nicknames. We all know a Smithy, or a Crossy, but how many of us can say they know an LCocks or a Beanz? Don’t get me wrong, they’re not the most unique nicknames in the world, but at least four other people don’t turn around when someone shouts them across a room. Rachel definitely thinks the “variety of nicknames” is a perk of a weird surname, making her “unforgettable”. As she rightly notes, “we’re stars.”

Megan Showers, 21

Megan Showers used to get the happy little ditty ‘Megan Showers bring May flowers’ sung to her at high school, which somewhat made up for the rather less appealing ‘Megan never Showers’ nickname. Even so, she likes “that [her] last name is different and not a whole lot of people have the same name!”

Sasha Bye, 22

Unoriginal jokes seem to be par for the course, with Sasha Bye claiming that “people always say ‘bye Sasha Bye’, then chuckle to themselves like they were the first person who thought of that.”

Fathom ‘Chin’ Stead, 22

Fathom ‘Chin’ Stead has a double whammy of weird names, but always goes by her nickname Chin. She claims to enjoy the confusion when people can’t tell if she’s male or female, as it “can make for some funny situations.”

Katrina Margolis, 23

And finally, if you’re lucky, your name could even lend you a kind of Daenerys Targaryen vibe. Katrina Margolis says “people always tell me it sounds like my name is from Game of Thrones, which is…good?” I think unless your name’s Bolton, it’s pretty good.