Vape ban 2025: Eight things Edinburgh students are bound to be puffing on next

We’ve all heard the news, the vape ban comes into place tomorrow, June 1 2025.

Whether you considered vaping a hobby, you only took a puff when you were drunk or stressed, or you never touched the things, it’s a big deal and anyway, there’s virtually no way you don’t know someone who spends half of their SAAS money on Elf Bars or Lost Mary’s.

Some areas of Edinburgh can be compared to the great smog, except with a scent of berry blast rather than exhaust: The bus stops in front of the Nicholson Street Lidl, the Subway dancefloor, the kitchen in every student accommodation to name a few. For a good chunk of Edinburgh’s student population, this won’t be the end of the vape, instead, something new is bound to be found, here’s our best bets.

1. Mango Venoms

If I could eat, drink and sleep on mango Venoms I would, why not vape them too? They already have the fruity flavour, may as well stick some vodka in there to get the party started.

2. The tears of the UoE Senior Leadership Team

That’s if you can catch any before they’re soaked up by their stacks of cash x

3. First year ‘essential’ textbooks

Finally, you get to put that £40 fresh textbook from Blackwells to good use. Enjoy the sweet relief of academic mediocrity, goodbye Politics: Fifth Edition, hello salvation.

4. Rat Poison

Since the mice and rats across Edinburgh clearly aren’t consuming it, we may as well make better use of it. I’m not sure if it will act as a depressant or a stimulant, but it will do something.

5. Whatever you can find in the bargain store

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There has to be something you can feasibly inhale in there, and at least it will be cheaper than a nicotine addiction. Even if there isn’t, you probably needed a new spatula or toilet brush anyway.

6. Raw, unadulterated delusion

Whatever that stuffed toy is going through, I get it

I feel like we all have this in abundance, why not commit to the bit, fake it till you make it applies even with vapes, just pretend you’re puffing on an elf bar and maybe you can convince yourself its real.

7. Your graduation roll

A bit of blue raspberry would hit right now

It’s basically just a larger Elf Bar that you spent years trying to get. Maybe uni was just the vapes we lost along the way.

8. The condensation in your mouldy bathroom

Look, we’re students, we can’t afford to put the heating on, it also means we can’t afford to let anything go to waste: Reduce, reuse, recycle.