Leeds graduate opens up about living with an eating disorder whilst at university

A Leeds graduate has opened up about living with an eating disorder whilst at university.

In the UK, at least 1.25 million people are living with an eating disorder, equating to about one in 50 people.

This Monday marks the first day of Eating Disorder Awareness Week, which is 24th February to 2nd March this year. The theme is “anyone can be affected by an eating disorder”.

Jake Ferguson, a former University of Leeds student, has spoken out about how transitioning to university exacerbated their already disordered eating habits.

The 26-year-old struggled with disordered eating for over 10 years before seeking professional help.

Jake, who is non-binary, has also lived with borderline personality disorder for four years.

The Leeds Tab asked Jake whether there was anything they would want to tell students who may be struggling with an eating disorder.

They said: “To know that no matter how lonely or worthless you feel, you do deserve to receive help and support, and to be kinder to yourself as well.

“Even though it feels scary now, it won’t always feel that way and you can take recovery as slowly as you need to.”

Jake added: “It doesn’t all have to happen at once. Small steps are still something to be proud of and a better place to be than where you were before.”

In a short but powerful film, shot in partnership with the Leeds and York NHS Foundation Trust, the former student explains how their disordered eating habits began at 14 or 15 years old, with cycles of restriction and comfort eating.

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These problems began to worsen significantly when they transitioned to university: “It was the first time I’d ever had an unlimited supply of food. I was suddenly the one who had to decide what I ate every day rather than my parents making me dinners.

“Suddenly it was on me to do whatever I wanted with food.”

Jake continued: “In my third year of uni, I went to my year abroad to Japan and some people there made some comments and they said that I gained a lot of weight, and for the first time I suddenly became really aware of my weight so I decided to eat healthier.

“It was a really slippery slope into a lot of restrictive eating.

“I was living every single day with pretty much no emotions other than intense guilt when I broke the rules that anorexia had set for me.”

As Jake’s mental health declined, they would go days without eating. After seeking professional help through their GP, Jake was referred to Connect, which is the adult NHS eating disorder service for West Yorkshire.

Speaking to Leeds Live, Jake said: “I loved the staff at Connect. They were so supportive, kind and compassionate.

“They never judged me. I was encouraged to go at my own pace and challenge the behaviours that were causing my problems.”

The Connect service is hosted by Leeds and York Partnership NHS Foundation Trust.

Jake received help from a specialist team there including a psychiatrist, dietitian, therapists and mental health nurses.

Now, whilst Jake’s relationship with food “has its ups and downs”, it is generally much healthier.

They said: “I’m on a journey of recovery. For example, I might go to a restaurant, and I just catch myself ordering something without even thinking about it.

“I just live my life the way I want to live it and how I used to live it. It’s been helpful and affirming for me to hear directly from people who’ve experienced an eating disorder.

“It makes you feel so much less alone, and you realise that what you feel is normal and that others have been exactly where you are.

“Now I want to provide that for other people. What I’ve been through has provided me with an immense resource to help others”.

After nearly a year out of therapy, Jake is looking at starting a PhD in English literature, focusing on trans and queer poetic adaptations of medieval culture. They are focusing on their writing and poetry, and a few have been accepted for publication.