Pints, pitchers and sticky tables: Here’s the ultimate London Wetherspoons guide

Sometimes you learn more from an evening around a sticky table than a lecture. From grand banking halls to pubs that feel like a doctor’s waiting room, every Wetherspoons tells a different story, and London is full of them.

From dirt-cheap student haunts to gilded ballrooms, we’ve compiled a list of the capital’s best.

The Half Moon

One of the cheapest Spoons within reasonable reach of central London, The Half Moon is a pub like no other. Just two minutes from QMUL, it’s always packed with students who treat it like a second home.

A Methodist chapel turned theatre turned Spoons, its open octagonal interior is paired with one of the best beer gardens in London. It’s as close to perfect as Spoons can get- a pitcher of Blue Lagoon will set you back just £9.45.

 The Crosse Keys

The Crosse Keys is arguably the best Spoons in Zone One. Once the Hong Kong and Shanghai bank, it’s now a leviathan of cheap pints.

Vast and slightly overwhelming, you could easily get lost among the hundreds of tables. The catch? A pitcher will set you back £14. Still, if you can elbow past the finance bros, it’s well worth a visit.

Hamilton Hall

After a few drinks, this Wetherspoons will have you thinking you’ve stepped into Bridgerton, rather than being next door to Liverpool Street Station.

Once the ballroom of the Great Eastern Hotel, it’s easily the prettiest Spoons in London: Gilded ceilings, ornate pillars, and chandeliers galore. But all the beauty comes at a price – it’s the most expensive Spoons in town, with pitchers hitting a whopping £14.85.

The Metropolitan Bar

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Perfect for the TfL nerd in your life. Housed in the former offices of the Metropolitan Railway (the line still running right underneath), it’s grand, airy and full of transport nerds and Sherlock fans.

With towering pillars and a generous amount of space, it’s basically impossible not to be impressed.

The Liberty Bounds

Ironically named, given it overlooks the Tower of London. A classic Spoons lifted by its view – upstairs seating gives a panorama of Tower Bridge, the Tower, and the Thames.

This Spoons has dark oak panelling and just the right amount of stickiness on the tables to complete its charm.

Penderel’s Oak

A dependable Holborn haunt for anyone who just wants a cheap pint and a seat. It’s got one of the better Spoons carpets in London, and a stained-glass façade that promises more grandeur than it delivers.

With the Bar Council next door, you’re guaranteed to overhear someone complaining about their GDL. And thanks to the collection of law books inside, even the dullest night can get a little duller.

Shakespeare’s Head

Despite the name, there’s not much drama here. This Spoons exudes conference room energy: Corporate lighting, awkward tables and a crowd that’s 50 per cent interns.

Along with its neighbour Penderel’s Oak, it’s one of central London’s most dependable but least inspiring Spoons.

The Sir John Oldcastle

Close to Farringdon station, this place is always rammed. Despite being absolutely covered in carnations, it’s one of the less visually remarkable Spoons.

Still, it does exactly what a Spoons should – no frills, no nonsense and no regrets.

 The Ice Wharf

A dream on paper: Canal-side location, large windows, and plenty of outdoor seating. In reality – chaos.

At the weekend, Camden’s Ice Wharf is a battlefield of tourists and stag dos. The outdoor seating can only do so much to rescue an interior that feels more like a ferry than a pub. Still, on a sunny day, it’s not the worst place to be, and a pitcher here runs slightly cheaper than most London locations at £13.32.