Crushing on someone who’s in a relationship? We rated the best advice for Exeter students

Valentine’s Day is fast approaching, and along with Spotify Wrapped, it’s often a hard time of year for some. Valentine’s Day was basically invented for smug couples so it can be a little rough on some of us. Whether you’re living your absolute best single life or are a complete mess masquerading as a functioning adult, it’s rarely a fun day.

Whilst partying with your gals and focusing on work are all good options for distractions, sometimes drowning your sorrows in a sarcastic article hits the spot. Consider this our moment of silence for those of you with unrequited crushes or worse – someone who’s already in a relationship. We Googled the best advice for getting over it to see if it actually worked for Exeter Uni students.

1. Avoid unnecessary interactions

Well, easier said than done at Exeter to be fair. Plus it’s sod’s law that the minute you try and actively avoid them, they’ll turn up randomly wherever you go, be it on campus, hung-over at Pura Vida, or worse, six Venoms in at TP on the dance-floor. Exeter is infamous for its incest and everyone knowing e v e r y o n e, so you’re really out of luck here. Besides, absence makes the heart grow fonder, so chances are that you avoiding them will only make you want them more.

Rating this one a solid 0/10.

2. Limit your social media stalking

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Hunny please, we’re all Gen Z here (sorry post-grads), and that means we are professional social media investigators. Asking us not to find out every detail and digitally obsess over someone is like asking Exeter students to sell their TP tickets on Overheard at face value – it’s not going to happen. Although, saying all that, it might not be the worst idea to try and over-analyse every post, in an attempt to work out if they’re having a rough patch just because they’ve been out with their mates two nights in a row.

Giving this one a generous 1/10

3. Distract yourself with other people and activities

This is more like it – get out there and party your sorrows away. Make sure you’re around different people, friends who sympathise and meeting new people. It doesn’t mean you necessarily have to go out looking for a prospective replacement crush, as you’ll inevitably end up comparing them to the person you’re still low-key in love with, but meeting new people will help you obsess slightly less. The only caveat here is that you may well end up running into your crush, but hey, at least you’ll look cool, fun and totally chilled (maybe practise playing it cool, just in case). Although it may be more gratifying to hide in your room, crying off mascara whilst listening to Taylor Swift, a good balance of the two is probably the best way forward.

A solid 8/10

4. Give your crush’s partner a break

Hm, can’t argue with this one. Although in practise you’re probably never going to get on 100 per cent, if you befriend them you’ll probably find out that they are actually awesome. Plus, if you befriend them and end up liking them, your feelings for your crush will probably fade a bit, and you’ll end up not wanting to hurt them.

(Side note… unpopular opinion, *but* if you befriend them and find out that they’re having issues / cheated / thinking of ending it, you can always encourage it and wait your turn… you might find out some gossip that makes it much easier to be around them. Just saying.)

Wholesome advice for the most part 10/10

5. Admit you don’t actually want to be ‘the other woman’

“The other woman”? Really? I mean, I understand where they’re coming from but, with an average age of 20 and average relationship span of around four months, I don’t think we can be accused of being mistresses / misters.

But, there is something to be said for the cheating thing – whether they physically cheat with you, emotionally, or just lead you on, that’s a massive red flag (think Tom on Winter Love Island). If they messed around their current partner, there’s a high chance you’ll be next, so watch out for yourself more than anything.

Femme fatal vibes aside, it’s quite a good point: 6.5/10

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