In defence of Ariana Grande and her ‘boyfriend stealing’ behaviour

Twitter has been collectively traumatised since news broke Ariana Grande and her Wicked co-star (and former SpongeBob SquarePants musical lead) Ethan Slater are dating. But no one was more pissed than this wife Lilly Jay— who rang every news outlet in America to spread the news Ariana was a man snatcher or, in her own words, the worst of all put-downs: “Not a girl’s girl.”

As you might expect, the subsequent home wrecker pile-on has been way harsh – to the point where in Ariana’s new single Yes, And? She questions: “Your business is yours and mine is mine/ Why do you care so much whose dick I ride?”. Now, fans have even accused Ariana of “gaslighting” them about the relationship after she defended herself in an interview.

Because, people are obsessed. They’ve even tracked back through Ariana’s dating history to point out she also allegedly started dating Big Sean and Pete Davidson while they were in relationships. One woman on TikTok, Rikki Valentina, claimed the infidelity burned her pedestrian love life, too: “When karma finally exposes Ariana Grande after she stole your boyfriend in 2010,” she wrote.

But, sorry, I’m ready and raring to defend women’s rights and women’s wrongs here. An insider told Page Six Ethan Slater and his wife had been separated for two months before he started dating Ariana: “She’s rightfully upset because her marriage fell apart, but Ariana and Ethan didn’t do anything wrong,” they said. 

And the other affairs? Lest we forget the eternal mantra (and wise words of Love Island‘s Antigoni): If you can take my man, you can have him. These men were so evidently not the world’s best boyfriends if their loyalty and willpower became non-existent at the first sniff of interest from another woman. They have free will and brains. They made the decision to stray themselves.

Yet somehow, culpability always falls on women when heads are turned. We’re temptresses whose bodies and affections are just too much for poor men with unmanageable natural urges to resist. “If you hadn’t flirted with him, he’d still be with his wife!”. Yeah, until the next bit of attention came along. Ariana Grande didn’t wreck Ethan Slater’s home. He seemingly trashed it himself.

But more than anything else, I’m not having Ariana Grande suddenly vilified and slated (“Ariana Grande is actually shit now she broke up a happy family,” one person Tweeted) for her shamelessly selfish approach to love, because she warned us all exactly who she was loud and clear in 2019.

We all merrily downloaded Break Up With Your Girlfriend, Im Bored and streamed on repeat. The track went straight to the top of the UK singles charts – only to be bumped off the top spot by Ariana’s own song 7 Rings. 600,000 copies were sold in six months. It’s too late to pearl clutch over the message now. And if you want to be horrified by anyone, it should probs be the cheating men.

Recommended stories by this writer:

• Ariana Grande doesn’t owe the internet an explanation of her weight loss 

• It’s all over your feed, so here’s a timeline of events between Ariana Grande and Ethan Slater 

• Every Ariana Grande single ranked from worst to best 

Featured image credit via Javier Garcia/Shutterstock.