All the looks Peach has served in Mario games, ranked by how hard they slay

She gagged the Mushroom Kingdom when she got on the motorbike

1 year ago

Considering she is the female video game character with the most appearances of all time, it’s perhaps not a shock that Princess Peach Toadstool has steadily gained the ability of having us all gag over her outfits. She’s not just a classic pink dress – she’s a fashion icon. Considering Nintendo have had her doing every sport under the sun and being kidnapped in all climates, it’s not surprising she’s had to dress for the occasion. Here are the outfits Peach has served across Mario games, ranked by how hard my expert opinion thinks they slay!

20. Cat

This one has its very specific audience, but that specific audience I have absolutely no part of and think this is all a bit twee. Not kink shaming, but let’s grow up!

19. Pink skirt and hat

Makes me feel like I’m watching that episode of The Crown where Charles and Diana are arguing on their tour of Africa.

18. Old school Peach

That big red trim just is not hitting. This Peach was bad vibes, she looks more of a good time gal these days.

17. Little tennis dress

WHAT ARE THOOOOOOOOSE!

16. Olympics leotard

Maybe I’m just being a bitch, but I HATE when the developers make a new outfit for Peach and it’s just her normal dress adapted a bit. Like, this is just a Jamie Lee Curtis workout leotard. Peach giving ‘OKAAYYYY’.

15. Classic Peach

You’ve seen it, you know it, you’re neutral on it. We’ve had it a long time, this one. The go-to Peach. It needs an update, I fear. We’re bored.

14. Explorer Peach

What the Jumanji is going on? Nice to see a shakeup in vibes though, I will give it that. The Pat Butcher earrings always endure.

13. Equestrian Peach

So tory. Gemma Owen era.

12. Golf skirt

This is a serious sporting look but I can’t help but feel like she’s just a uni fresher on her way to do pub golf in Leeds.

11. Farmer Peach

Half Glasto, half Drag Race queen in the Werk Room – farmer Peach is a nice little shakeup compared to the rest of the outfits she sports in Mario games. Odyssey really went all out for Peach design and I loved it. Oh to watch Lana Del Rey in Worthy Farm with a denim-laden Peach.

10. Classic Peach (PONYTAIL EDITION)

Hold on… Why does this change everything? Why am I gagged, gooped and slayed? Is this the most powerful ponytail in existence?

9. Detailed Smash Bros Peach

Graphically, the Super Smash Bros games take a more detailed approach to Mario, Peach and everyone else’s outfits – and it pays off. After looking at these dresses from the three games Peach has scrapped in, looking back at her default outfit anywhere else feels like you’re watching CBBC.

8. Footie kit Peach

Okay go off Amanda Bynes in She’s The Man!

7. Shortsleeves in Mario Sunshine

The colour changes! The parasol! The iconic ponytail! The arms out! She left Isle Defino quaking when she stepped off the jet in this.

6. Bikini

Legs taller than the highest shrooms in the Kingdom!I just know Mario lost his shit when he walked past this ensemble in Odyssey. The power moons on the sarong is inspired.

5. Kimono Peach

I mean, come on! The blossom! The colour schemes! She looks insane and she knows it. A hard slay.

4. Wedding dress Peach

Slayed beyond belief. If Bowser is going to force you to get married you might as well look this immaculate if you’re doing it.

3. Yukata Peach

The power flower print on the yukata? The blooper on the fan? THE BOO ON THE HEAD? This is drag.

2. All black

Paris fashion week never recovered from this Dior looking moment. I still can’t believe this is real???

1. Motorbike

I wish there was a camera on me when I first booted up Mario Kart Wii and saw this look for the first time because my jaw was not able to be found. It had plummeted into the abyss. She should bin her dress off and wear this at all times. It’s perfection.

All images credited to Nintendo.

@harrisonjbrock