This is which horror movie you should watch, based on your York college

With the spooky season right around the corner, there’s no time of year more fitting to assign each college a horror film. So hide behind your sofas, turn out the lights and prepare to be scared.

Alcuin – A Quiet Place

When you accidentally break the eerie silence of Alcuin College by snapping a twig underfoot, your pulse quickens and your palms clam up. Making noise here seems illegal, or maybe even lethal. No horror film has captured this sensation better than John Krasinski’s A Quiet Place, in which he stars alongside Emily Blunt.

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Anne Lister – Pride and Prejudice and Zombies

Despite being named after an iconic Yorkshirewoman from around 400 years ago, Anne Lister is one of the newest colleges on campus. This blend of past and present goes perfectly with the action/horror/parody Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, a film that sells itself with its title.

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Constantine – Get Out

Once you’ve spent five minutes there, you will know that the first thing to do in Constantine is Get Out.

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David Kato – Midsommar

The baby college. Mysterious. Elusive. No one really knows what’s going on there. Perhaps behind the polished façade of their gated community lies something sinister…alas, probably not. Still, Midsommar’s the kind of horrifying cult movie you guys could really relate to. Plus, it stars Florence Pugh, so there’s no excuse to skip this one.

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Derwent – Scream (1996)

I spent many evenings last year walking through Derwent to get to East Campus. And every single time, they haunted me: The howls in the night. Derwent’s version of a flat party is both hilarious and disturbing, much like 1996’s Scream. Unlike the 2022 Scream, which is perfunctory and pointless.

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Goodricke – Don’t Look Now

The college no-one’s really heard much about. Sadly, the same can be said of Nicholas Roeg’s brilliant 1973 chiller Don’t Look Now. Even if it turns out to be true that Goodricke doesn’t exist, Don’t Look Now definitely does. And if anyone from Goodricke is out there, it’s worth the watch. In fact, everyone should give this a watch. Who knew Venice in winter was so beautiful?

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Halifax – The Cabin in the Woods

Whilst walking through Halifax, one may be forgiven for feeling lost. Do people from Halifax even know where Halifax is? It doesn’t resemble any other college, nor feel like any other. The disquiet of the atmosphere, plus the isolated setting, makes Halifax perfect for The Cabin in the Woods.

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James – 28 Days Later

The sporty college. Not many horror films are about sport. But in 2002, director Danny Boyle wanted to make his zombies scary, so he made them run. The average James student will respect the cardiovascular health of the undead in the terrifying 28 Days Later.

Langwith – Us

United by that campus’s only student bar, The Glasshouse, there’s a real sense of Us in Langwith. Known as the sociable college on East, that’s the horror film you should watch if you’re there.

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Vanbrugh – The Exorcist

Not knowing a particularly large amount about Vanbrugh, I decided to be a good journalist and give them a Google to see what’s going on there. I was greeted by a picture of their mascot, which is what I assume Barney the Dinosaur looks like when you’re on a bad trip. In an attempt to purge the demon out of the mascot, I suggest you fetch The Exorcist.

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Wentworth – Nosferatu

Postgraduates. I recognise there are many new films on this list you may not be aware of. So how about a classic for the oldies? The unofficial adaptation of Dracula, the chilling silent vampire movie, 1922’s Nosferatu. Maybe some of you even remember it coming out.

Special addition: Fairfax House – The Shining

Anyone who has ever glimpsed upon the imposing facade of Fairfax House will have felt a chill to the bone. Anyone who has ever taken a step down its unnervingly empty corridors will have been glad to have escaped alive. Even then, resembling the Overlook Hotel is sufficient criteria for it to be matched with Stanley Kubrick’s The Shining. Here’s Johnny!

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Whatever your plans for Halloween are, remember: Get Out of Constantine, watch out for Zombies in Anne Lister and may the power of Christ compel Vanbrugh. Happy Halloween!

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• Here is the definitive guide to your autumn bucket list in York