What your Mario Kart character says about you as a Uni of York student

Peach is the poster girl for Constantine


As a third year at York, I know how important it is to relax and unwind after a long day of lectures. For some students that means cozy self-care nights, for others its spontaneous trips to Flares. For me, it’s beating my flatmates at Mario Kart.

You might think the character you choose doesn’t mean much at all. You’re wrong. It tells me everything I need to know about you as a Uni of York student, and whether I’d trust you with my drink or not.

This is what your choice says about you:


You have too much energy in the 9am lectures and it scares me. Please give me a minute, some of us have only just woken up. I get it, you’ve been up since the crack of dawn to get your 6am Sports Village workout in, but I’ve just dragged myself out of bed to be here so calm down.

Although, to be fair, it’s not even that you’re just a morning person, you have WAY too much energy all day. It’s a bit much, no offence.


If you play as Luigi, yes, you were a great STYC. Everyone loved you.

But we’re halfway through the semester and your still hanging out with your freshers? It’s really time to move on. They can’t be your freshers forever. You’ll be okay without them, I promise. Maybe try making some friends your own age?


There’s a 99 per cent chance you’re in Constantine since Peach is undeniably the poster girl for the poshest college on campus. If you could change the car, you’d definitely choose a FIAT 500.

That said, Peach is also one for the girls, gays and theys. Pink is an elite colour to give Constantine some credit. It’s giving Legally Blonde and I’m so here for it.


It’s a 50/50 split: you could be super chill or you could be completely insufferable, there’s no in-between.

If you chose Daisy to be different, please grow up. You probably listen to really “underground” indie artists like The Artic Monkeys and you would never been seen dead in Flares. Sorry, you’re probably too cool to go clubbing at all. Instead you’ll drag me to a “really niche little bar” that turns out to be Turtle Bay (I’m not complaining though).

On the other hand, you could just genuinely be cool. I’m sorry if the first group of Daisy-users ruin your rep.


Yeah, if this one is your favourite please stay away from me. It’s giving you’ll be going to Pop World when you’re 50 and trying to relive your uni years.

Yes, to each their own, but why would you pick the one that radiates stalker energy?


You’re definitely the party lad. You chose James College because its the “sporty college” and now you’re on the sevens team for some sports team that you shut up about it. I guess you can be fun (I use the term lightly) on a night out, but only after the rest of us have had a few shots. Until then, you’re probably insufferable.


You’re a crybaby. You still haven’t grown out of tattling to teachers and will 100 per cent have done all the reading for the lecture then make the rest of us feel bad for not doing it. We’re all doing our best calm down.

In fact I bet you’re the person constantly putting their hand up in the Spring Lane Lecture hall. Seriously, what’s wrong with you?

Although, to be fair, if you ask the question I was wanting to, thank you for your service.


I feel like you’re the only person who can work the library booking system, and you’re probably the only one who still uses it. You’d definitely kick me out of your seat and feel smug as I try to move all my stuff to the seat next to “your” one. Could you not just sit in the empty chair next to me?

Maybe you’re just ahead of the curb though because I seem to spend hours wandering around the library looking for a seat. Maybe I’m the problem.


I just know you don’t show up to lectures or seminars. In fact, I bet you’re the person in my group project that I never heard from who still managed to end up with the same grade. At some point, you just have to respect it.

While Checkin might have thrown a spanner in the works, I wouldn’t worry that much – I’ve already given up trying to use it.


You can only study when you’ve got an iced oat milk latte so naturally you’re a regular at the Link and the Kitchen. You love to romanticise your uni life and fair enough! You know you’ve hit rock bottom when you end up in the library cafe though.


All those characters to choose from and you still pick yourself? You’re probably a narcissist who books up all the office hours weeks in advance.

Hopefully you’ll overthink your Mario character before playing now. I promise everyone else is judging.

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