What your preferred Lancs coffee shop says about you

Sorry to break it to you, but Brew isn’t as original as you thought

1 year ago

Whether you’re a cafe connoisseur or a more casual coffee drinker, you probably have your favourite coffee haunts in Lancaster. You can’t have a favourite coffee shop without expecting some judgement from other people when you tell them you never go anywhere but Costa, or take all of your brunch dates to The Herbarium. Yes, they all have very different vibes but your coffee shop of choice says a LOT about you. It’s basically another Myers-Briggs test.

Costa

You’re a masochist. The convenience of the campus Costa is great, especially when you’re running on two hours’ sleep and pure spite, but there are other coffee shops with more to offer. You’re probably also obsessed with the idea of the Costa beans, and convince yourself the amount of money you spend on coffee is worth it for the free drink.

Starbucks

You go there to “study”, but end up gossiping for four hours and no actual work gets done. Your cupboard is cluttered with Starbucks-branded cold cups and you make it your whole personality. You claim you’re better than the Costa-goers but in reality, you’re kidding yourself. Why would you spend your student loan on essentials like food when you can spend it on Starbucks?

Cafe Nero

You take life way too seriously. You’re a model student, but you could do with letting your hair down a little bit. At least you’ll come out of uni with a good degree.

Brew

After Costa and Starbucks, this is perhaps the most basic coffee shop of choice. You definitely like Harry Styles, but you love thrifting and kilo sales. Yes, the vibes are immaculate, but you could at least branch out a little.

The Herbarium

If you frequent here, you are the best kind of person. The aesthetic is wonderful, along with the coffee and the food. If you’re not vegan, then you’re probably LGBTQ+. It may still be a bit basic, but at least you’re trying to do some good for the planet.

Holm

Holm may be Norwegian, but you love IKEA. You own at least one Djungelskog, ten fake plants and love interior design. Your bedroom is the one all your housemates love because you’ve put so much care into decorating it. Honestly, you’re what we should all aspire to be.

Journey Social

You live for brunch. Forget breakfast, lunch and dinner: brunch is your favourite meal. Honestly, this is understandable, because brunch is so versatile and the perfect excuse to not go to your Thursday morning lectures when you’re suffering from a raging hangover.

The Printroom

Located in The Storey, this hidden gem proves you love the simpler things in life. You definitely have an abundance of sunrise and sunset pictures on your camera roll, and you love nothing more than sitting in the living room chatting about nothing with your housemates. You’re getting the best out of life, and we love that for you.

Bob & Berts

A true music connoisseur. You own at least 20 vinyls, and are never seen anywhere without your trusty over-ear headphones. Not only are you a music expert, but you’re literal sunshine in a bottle, and what would we do without you?

The Castle Cafe

You go here simply for the vibes in the hope it might motivate you to write that essay. You’re either the eldest child or you have burnt-out gifted kid syndrome, and you definitely got the king in the ‘Soldier, Poet, King’ test. Please, be kind to yourself.